Happiness Pending
by LotrNaustenfan
Summary: Times are hard, Voldemort is on the loose, but in one house there is a bigger problem than a Dark Lord: how to get a baby to sleep. An LJ fic, not always romantic, but always funny.
1. Bedtime Stories and Confrontations

Happiness Pending

Chapter 1—Bedtime stories and Confrontations

The sky was fading to a black midnight. There were night clouds in the sky that colored the almost blackness in purple radiance. But they clouded the stars making it even darker. There was nothing to light the way in the sky, but magic could spark the way.

One lone creature of the night walked the streets tonight. A spark alit the end of his wand. He was garbed in a long traveling cloak with the hood up. Whoever he was he was sure to be masked. He traveled this road without even looking up, like he had traveled it every day of his life. The houses lined his path, but he wasn't looking. He was busy staring at the ground and occasionally at the thing in his hand. It was a pendant on a long chain. He fingered it with delicacy like it was the most prized possession of the world.

He smiled for one solitary moment and then he stopped. He stopped walking, smiling, everything. He was standing in front of a large house on a big hill. It was dark now, but you could tell it was radiant. He looked up to see one light still on in the farthest bedroom. He smiled again. He was home.

* * *

Lily Potter was sitting in an old wicker chair with blood shot eyes. Her eyes were locked on the open window. The moon was clouded tonight and the clouds were filled with knowing and dread. They looked on her with purpose this night. Her mind, however, was elsewhere.

She wasn't up so late for no reason. She had been listening to her son cry for hours and nothing seemed to calm the new arrival. He was only a couple weeks old, but his wailing, Lily thought, would testify against his age. It seemed that the younger they were the more troublesome. She would have thought having children was a complete mistake if not for those beautiful green eyes and black hair. He really was her child, and her husband's child. So much of both of them was found in every feature of his face. Everyone said he looked just like James, but Lily saw a lot of her in him as well. The delicate nose, the soft lips—those were hers.

She had almost forgotten that her son was screaming as she looked at his baby features. She had _almost_ forgotten. Then, she looked down into his sparkling eyes that were glistening with fresh tears, and started to give up hope of ever getting back to bed. This was day three of no sleep, but that wasn't entirely her son's fault. She also had problems sleeping because of the recent raids. Sometimes James went on the raids late at night, leaving her with her little one, but other nights she was the one gallivanting off.

Her thoughts were momentarily stopped, however, when her son gave a loud burp and then stopped crying. She stared in shock that something that simple could make the little one stop screaming.

Now that he was calm, she stood up from her wicker chair and went to place him in his bassinet. He didn't seem very happy about it and reached up to grab her finger. She was very touched, but very sleepy and she didn't want to make him cry again.

"Fine, baby Harry, if you want your mama to stay with you until you fall asleep I better come up with a good story." She thought about it as she gave her son her finger, which he immediately thrust into his mouth. There was only one story Lily knew and it was a silly muggle story about a Cinder girl and her wicked stepmother. Deciding that wasn't the right story for a newly born little boy, she thought harder. She concluded that the only story worth telling was a true story.

"Harry, I'm going to tell you about how I fell in love with your father. It's a long story, and it's not too pretty, but its true, and there is nothing better than honesty. At least that's what your papa says to me all the time."

Harry giggled, but Lily was already in La La Land thinking and dreaming of her Prince Charming who didn't start out so charming, as she remembered.

"Now, your daddy was the cutest and most sought after boy at Hogwarts that year. Everyone knew his name, and everyone knew he was bound to rock that school on its heels. But, he didn't expect what happened next." She smiled in memory and Harry sucked her first finger. "Do you know what happened, Harry? He met me."

* * *

"Excuse me! Could you help me please?" Lily was rushing back and forth between platforms 9 and 10. She had no idea where platform 9 ¾ was. But that was what her ticket said, and her letter had said very specifically "stick to your ticket." She was trying to find someone who knew what that actually meant, but she was failing miserably.

Her family had escorted her into the train station, but when they saw the trains lining the path they wished her luck and left. It wouldn't have been a problem if not for her ticket. Now, she was pacing and asking for help from people who simply wouldn't listen, while the clock, ever so slowly, ticked away. Five minutes. That was all she had left. Then, the only place that would ever see her as extraordinary instead of out of the ordinary would be gone.

She decided to yell for help one last time, and as she spun to walk back to the other platform she bumped into someone. Rather, she very ungracefully bombarded someone.

"I am so sorry!" she said as she looked up into the face of a dark haired boy with glasses. He looked to be about her age, but she couldn't be sure. He was carrying a cage with an owl in it, and the animal clucked at her when she spoke.

"Randalf," he said introducing the owl to her, "he's a bit of a menace sometimes. But he warms up to people. What is your animal?" She stared dumbfounded. He was speaking as if he already knew her.

"I'm sorry, but do I know you?"

"No," he said very casually, "but you are going to Hogwarts, aren't you?"

"How did you know that?"

He ignored the question and put his finger to his lips in concentration. "Let me guess," he said with a conceited smile, "you're a muggle born and your letter didn't tell you how to get onto the platform? Am I right?"

She scoffed as if disgusted, but mostly out of lack of understanding. She had no idea what he was talking about. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, that's why you were calling for help isn't it?"

She paused. She had no idea how to respond, so she just chose not to. "What's a muggle born?"

He smiled at her change of subject, but indulged her question. "Well, muggles is non magic folk. So I'm guessing, especially now, that you were born to a non magic family: muggle born."

She frowned. For some reason she felt very lowly right now. This boy seemed to bring out the worst in her. She hadn't been this angry since her sister had called her a freak in front of all her friends. That had been a long time ago, and it was the only time she had recalled being truly angry. "Who are you, anyway?" She said as she flicked her hair over her shoulder.

Momentarily he seemed to loose his proud stance as he saw her flick her hair. He almost forgot to answer as he looked at her with softness in his eyes. Then, in true Lily fashion she gave him a look that said, "anytime now!" and he reverted back to his silly grin. "The name's James. James Potter."

"Well, Potter, I've got to be going. I've got the platform to go onto." She turned to scurry off and then remembered that she still had no idea how to get onto the platform. She turned back around and James was covering his mouth with his hand as if to try to prevent laughter from escaping.

"After you, my lady," he said with a laugh and a bow. As he did so, he began walking backward toward the wall between the two platforms. But then, something happened. He wasn't walking toward the wall at all. Lily watched as the young boy gave a final bow and then _disappeared_ into the wall.

Her mouth fell open. "What is this magic?" she said. Well, she thought, it's worth a try. So, she walked toward the wall, while she looked around to make sure no one saw her. Then she fell into the wall and landed on the other side.

She was shocked. It worked! James was right!

Oh, gag, she thought. She looked around and saw a sign that said "Platform 9 ¾" but there was no sign of the conceited little boy who showed her how to get there.

Good, she thought, maybe that will be the last encounter I have with the cocky git James Potter!

* * *

Harry giggled and Lily smiled. It was a good memory, but it was only the beginning.

* * *

A/N: Ok, that is the first chapter! I have been dying to start writing this, but I've hada bit of writers block. I have no idea, how long it will be before I get the next chapter up. I've started writing it, but I still havea little writers block. If you can't tell from this chapter then you should read some of my other stuff, then you would understand how different this is compared to what I usually write.

Well, I hope you like it and, please review when you are done! It means a lot, it may even get chapters up quicker! wink wink... lol.


	2. Torture for a Book Worm

Chapter 2—Torture for a Book Worm

Disclaimer: Opps, forgot to say I don't own this. Well, I don't own Harry Potter, I just own my take on his parents relationship!

"Ok, Harry, now, I thought that encounter would be the last time I would see your Daddy, but, boy, was I wrong."

* * *

Lily packed up her bag as quickly as she could. She wanted to be the first student to class. She loved school in the muggle world, and she knew she would love classes here, where she could actually practice her peculiarities. Once her things were in order she rushed out of the room and down the stairs. She pushed past people on her way down, and some of them yelled back at her, but most just rolled their eyes. 

It hadn't taken long for them all to become familiar with Lily Evans, the Gryffindor who acted like a Ravenclaw. It didn't make any sense why she would be sorted into Gryffindor. She had already read _Hogwarts, A History_ and the full text of the Arithmancy book. It had only been three days! And now they were getting ready for their first classes and she was the first one out the door. Big surprise.

On her way out of the portrait, she barely recognized the hazel eyes and black messy hair of a certain boy. She tried to ignore it, but she couldn't help the rising anger. She hurried to try to get some air on her face, maybe that would help, or at least she hoped.

She had been so happy when she was sorted into Gryffindor, and then she had switched emotions almost instantly when the name 'Potter, James' was called and several girls near her sighed. The nail in the coffin, however, was when the ruff voice of the sorting hat said, "Gryffindor." Several people cheered, but Lily just crossed her arms.

Now, she was on a more important mission, than thinking about a silly boy. And yet, she found herself thinking about him anyway. Sure, he was cute, she even fancied herself with him in some small corner in her mind, but then she remembered how horrible he had been, and how he had deliberately been evil to her. Then, she had no doubt about what she felt for James Potter.

As her thoughts went in circles, it took no time for her to make it to the Charms classroom. She took a deep breath and then opened the door. What she saw made her smile. No one was there yet.

She found a seat right in the middle of the classroom and sat down her stuff on the table. As she looked around she saw that the room was quite small and curve shaped. The seats had been arranged in a circular formation the match the room and her seat was right even with the teacher's desk. She was so pleased she couldn't help herself. She pulled out her parchment with her schedule scribbled on it. Charms was taught by Professor Flitwick and this class was reserved for First Year Gryffindors and Hufflepuff. Ravenclaw and Slytherin were in the next class no doubt.

She thought of all the things she would be able to learn in this class and she felt a rush of excitement in her stomach. She had read so much about Wizards and Witches, but she had never actually seen magic at work. The only time she had seen anything peculiar at all was when her sister had angered her at breakfast and her cup blew up. But Lily was certain that was not her fault, and even if it was she hadn't meant to.

Soon, other people walking in to the room disrupted her. She didn't look up, however. She was too busy reading her Charms book. Just as she was reading about a very interesting charm that enabled a person to summon anything, she was disrupted again by someone sitting down beside her.

"Hi, Evans."

_Oh Merlin's Beard._

Lily looked up from her book and saw the face she least wanted to see. "Potter." He was smiling widely and putting his feet up on the desk. "Do you just live to torment me or this some kind of scheme to get me to do your homework for you?"

"Sorry to disappoint, but the other seats are taken." He smiled widely and she grimaced.

"Bull, Potter, not even half the class is here yet."

"Yes, but I have to sit in the center of the room, or else all the pretty girls won't be able to see me."

She rolled her eyes, he laughed.

"Come on, Evans, get a sense of humor!"

"So it's the first assumption then?" He was clearly not here for homework help.

"First assumption?" she looked up into the face of Sirius Black, a fellow First Year who tagged along with James everywhere. "What the heck does first assumption mean?"

"A little too late to enter the conversation, Sirius," James said as he rubbed his temple.

"In other words, get a life," Lily said with a nod to the only empty seat in the room, which was next to Emmeline Vance. He huffed and then walked away.

"Why are you so mean to him?" James' voice came from beside her.

She looked back over at Sirius. He was crossing his arms and moving his seat as far away from Emmeline as possible. She on the other hand was looking at him longingly. "Two words, Potter, conceit and stupidity."

"He's not really stupid, he just pretends to be."

"And like you would know the difference," she said felling very proud of herself. At that moment, though, she was interrupted by the appearance of their teacher. She was shocked at first at his appearance. He was a short stubby big eared creature with a big smile. She was trying to listen to what he was saying, but James wouldn't stop talking to her.

"You know you might actually be surprised by how smart I can be."

She couldn't help it she had to respond.

"The only surprise will be my foot in your arse, if you don't shut up," she whispered.

"Fiesty. You know, you might want to stop that or you'll never get friends. Or do you think that those books are enough solace?"

In the background, Professor Flitwick was speaking, but she was so angry she had completely forgotten about him.

"Screw you."

"Dirty mouth as well. That at least I can appreciate."

"Do you live to drive people crazy?"

"No, I just want to know how you do it."

"How I do what?"

"Pretend that you actually care about this stuff. All he's talking about is the new year, and how he wants us to feel comfortable, blah blah blah."

"Well, you wouldn't know that would you, since you aren't listening."

"Neither are you."

"Well, at least I'm trying!" She yelled and immediately regretted it.

"Miss Evans, do you have something to share with the class?" Professor Flitwick asked in his little voice.

"No, Professor, I was simply—" she began but someone cut in.

"She was helping me. I had a question but I didn't want to disturb you." _Potter_.

"Oh," Flitwick said, looking anxious. He didn't know what to say exactly. "Well, hold it until after class next time, Mr. Potter."

"Yes, sir."

Flitwick went back to his lesson and Lily finally let out the breath she didn't know she was holding. She decided to chance a look at James, but she regretted it once she had. He was looking at her with his silly grin. His apparent conceit was all over his face. He knew he had done a service to her, and she knew he would never let her forget it.

* * *

"And that is how my first year at Hogwarts began. Fun, right?"

Harry just giggled.

A/N: Ok, that is another chapter. I am so excited at the response to this story! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter as much as the last one. Thanks for reading, and please review!


	3. Secret Telling

Chapter 3: Secret Telling

Disclaimer: So... yeah...you know the drill.

"James Potter was a curious creature to me. I thought he was cute, but I never understood why he did the things he did. He got into trouble and lost Gryffindor house a great deal of points. Something I expect you to never do!" Lily said to her little boy. Harry just looked at her with those strong knowing eyes of his and smiled.

"But then one day, I finally understood somehow. I just figured it out, whether I had wanted to or not."

* * *

"Hi again!" came the voice of James Potter from beside her. Lily had been sitting in front of the fire in the Gryffindor common room trying to do homework when his face appeared again. She was beginning to think his entire purpose in life was to torment her. 

"What do you want, Potter?"

"I wanted to know if you wanted to come hang out with me and Sirius."

"You must think I'm crazy."

"No, I just—" she was still fiddling with her text book and it was obviously driving him crazy because he yanked it out of her hands.

"Hey, give that back!" she shouted as she tried to grab the text book, but he just teased her by holding it over his head.

"Hang out with us."

"No!"

"Come on. It won't be that bad."

At that she stopped reaching for the book. "That is bull, James Potter, and you know it is. The two of you already have a reputation for being troublemakers. I do not want to be a part of that."

"Listen, Evans, you owe me and you know you do." He smiled sheepishly and it made her roll her eyes.

"What do you want, Potter? Do you want to ruin my reputation? Make me lose self esteem? Or do you just want to annoy me for the rest of my life?"

He just smiled in response and grabbed her arm.

Lily had no idea what was going on. She was sitting in the library between James Potter and Sirius Black. It was dark and there was no fire in the library, for good reason, so she couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable. James was inches from her face whispering as if someone would hear them.

"Evans, this is the library."

She almost full out laughed.

"We have brought you here on official business. We have been on a very important mission—"

"Which is none of your business," blurted out Sirius from her other side.

"Sirius," James reprimanded.

"Ok, where do I come in?" Lily asked.

"Well, you like books and stuff," Sirius said.

"Yeah, so?" she offered back.

"Well, what Sirius is trying to say is that we have been looking for some information and have hit a dead end."

"What information?"

"James," Sirius looked over at him cautiously, but James was looking straight at Lily.

"On Animagus's."

Lily wrinkled her brow. She had only heard of animagus's in Defense Against the Dark Arts. Apparently it was a good method for secrecy. The person who became an animagus would be able to turn into an animal, one specific animal, at will. But why would they want to know about animagus's?

"Ok," she said, deciding to play dumb. "So…what's the problem? Why don't you just look up animagus's?"

They exchanged a look. "We need something more specific than just what affects becoming an animagus has."

She looked from one to the other waiting for them to explain but they didn't so she decided to ask, "Specific how?"

James opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius cut in. "Why do you need to know!" he yelled, then he turned to James and starting whispering again. "James, we are jeopardizing the whole thing if we tell her. She's a tattle tale."

Lily opened her mouth to protest, but James stopped her with his hand. "No, I trust her." He was looking at her weird, and she was looking at him for the first time with respect

"We want to know about how to become Animagus's," Sirius said quietly through gritted teeth.

She raised an eyebrow and looked into their eyes that were serious now, more so than she had ever seen. She couldn't help it she actually laughed.

* * *

"Yes, I laughed till my sides hurt," Lily said as she laughed at the memory. "It didn't help that they looked so stunned. I could have sworn that Sirius's mouth hit the ground, but I could be wrong." She stopped giggling and put her hand on her lips. She took a small pause and looked down at her son. He was still wide awake. "Those were the good old days, Harry. I miss it. But no amount of missing it will ever be more than my love for you." She kissed his forehead and went to grab a blanket for him. She hoped it would encourage him to sleep, but it didn't. 

"Well, ok, I guess I have to keep telling the story then, huh?"

Harry looked up and Lily could have swore he shook his head.

A/N: Sorry, I have no idea where this is going, so if you get confused, I apologize, it's not the best fic in the world. I hope you enjoy it all the same, though. Oh, and I apologize for the length. It's not very long, but I tried. The next chapter will be longer.


	4. Kisses and Arguments

Chapter 4: Kisses and arguments

"Well, little did I know, that they had a bigger plan in order. Obviously I had figured out that their goal was to become animagus's at some point. The bigger plan, however, was that they wanted to do it before they left Hogwarts. I told them it was ridiculous, that the Ministry would never agree to amateurs in magic becoming Animagus's. That's when they informed me that that was the reason they needed me." Lily looked down at Harry and saw that he had taken to sucking on his thumb during the story. He did look a lot like his father. Lily just hoped he didn't end up with the same reputation for troublemaking.

* * *

"We need every book we can find!" James said as he ran from bookshelf to bookshelf. "The more information we have the faster we can set to figuring this whole thing out. If we get all the knowledge it takes we can do it in no time."

"But, James," said Sirius in a whiny voice, "how are three First Years gonna figure out one of the most difficult things to accomplish in Wizarding kind?"

"Sirius, you forgot someone," was his only response.

"I wasn't including her!" he said as he pointed to Lily. James just rolled his eyes and went to another bookshelf.

Lily, who till this time had also been going from bookshelf to bookshelf, laughed at their banter. "Another reason I shouldn't like you boys."

"What's that?" the boys said together.

"You can't count," she said just as she slammed a very large book down on the table, "there are only two of you here."

"There is another," Sirius said simply.

James smirked, "He just doesn't know it yet."

"So how do you plan to pass this off?" Lily asked as she arranged some books on a side table.

"What ever do you mean?" James asked with an innocent look on his face.

"How are you gonna convince them that you can do it?"

"Who said we were going to convince someone?"

Lily stopped and just stared from one boy to the other. "You can't think you are gonna do this without the Ministry's approval, do you?"

"Now, what makes you say that?"

Lily just gave him a look in response that said, 'don't test me, little boy' so he decided not to push her anymore.

"Lils, please. We're gonna figure this out at some point, but for right now, I just want to know if it's possible."

"Why is it so important?"

Sirius grabbed James' arm quickly before he said a word. For a second they exchanged a look, but James turned back to her as he shrugged off Sirius' hand. "I can't tell you that. I'm sworn to secrecy."

"What happened to trusting me?"

"I'm sorry, Evans, this secret is not mine to tell."

She was slightly hurt by his comment, but mostly just mad. She looked down at the heap of books: all the work she had put into this, and he wouldn't even tell her why. But Lily was all about balance and being level headed, so she took a breath and tried to talk. "Ok, well, if we are done here," and then she tried to leave.

"Wait," James said as he rushed around the table with ease, finding his way to her side. "Will you help us again tomorrow?"

Her eyes went wide. "You must be kidding?" How dare he after he had denied telling her their big secret!

"No," he said with a silly grin, which erased her bad feelings for him. "If you aren't here, who's gonna be the brains of the operation?"

She rolled her eyes and smiled, to spite herself. "I guess I have a duty to the mission."

He looked at her as she turned away, and then he did something very daring…

"He kissed me on the cheek. It was only a second, but it was glorious. I had never felt anything like it. I was 11 years old and a kiss on the cheek was an achievement. Not to mention he was the cutest boy in our year. I liked him, then, but I could never admit it. After all, he was a boy and a mean boy at that, and I couldn't put myself out there for ridicule and embarrassment. So, I held it in."

That next day she couldn't stop thinking about it. Every time she saw him she blushed and every class she had with him, she couldn't help but be nice to him. He sat next to her in potions and she actually smiled when he put down his bag. When he looked at her curiously with a silly smirk, her smile fell quickly.

She suddenly realized what she was doing. She was giving in. She was accepting that she actually liked James Potter. This was completely unacceptable. She couldn't let the boy with the biggest ego in her class know that she had a thing for him.

_No_, she thought, _I don't have a thing for him; just a silly crush is all._

And with that thought she left. She went back to the common room after classes, and didn't think about him again. As she went to the fire to delve into homework she quickly forgot everything except for the astrological glyphs of the Uranians. She was working on memorizing Poseidon for her Astronomy test the next day when James Potter came up beside her and sat down. The couch was plenty big enough for the both of them, but for some reason he sat as close to her as possible. Lily was so glad that most of the other people were out on the grounds rather than in the common room. She did not need people seeing this.

"Lily," he began which shocked her incredibly, "are you coming or what?"

"Wow, you know I've never felt deja vous before, but I'm getting it now," she said and looked back down at her book. "It seems that every time I decide to do my homework, you decide to annoy me again."

"So are you?" he said, completely ignoring her words.

"Excuse me?" she asked confused.

"Are-you-com-ing," he enunciated, "to-the-Li-brar-y…"

She gave a nasty face with a grimace playing all over it. He had hit a nerve. "I'm trying to study you, nitwit."

"Hey, now there is no need for name calling, I just wanted—" he began but she cut in.

"No need for name calling? But it is just fine to make fun of someone because they are doing something they are supposed to do?"

He looked down at her book. "Astronomy is pointless."

"Excuse me?" Now she was very offended.

"You heard me."

"Astronomy is very important in knowing the way our universe works. Look at Galileo—"

"Git," he affirmed.

"Aristotle—"

"Old dead guy," he commented with a 'duh' face.

"Copernicus—"

"Spent his time hanging out on a turret for days on end."

She growled at him and continued, "Ptolemy—"

"Who?"

She let out a huff and then stormed upstairs with her book in hand.

"So I'll see you soon?" he yelled up the stairs. He let out a gust of air, ran his fingers through his hair and laughed as he ran out the portrait hole.

Lily, however, found nothing amusing as she sat down in her bed trying to work on her astronomy. Her mind kept wandering, though, and she couldn't concentrate. She kept thinking about how he kissed her on the cheek. Not to mention, she did feel a little guilty about not helping them when she said she would.

After she could stand it no longer, she got up out of her bed, and ran out the room…without her astronomy book.

* * *

"I was so angry with him! But I couldn't just ditch on Sirius too, no matter how weird it is to actually say that. I had promised them… plus…I wanted to prove that he didn't get to me."

She looked down, and Harry's eyes were still wide awake, but now he was chewing on his foot.

"Harry, get that thing out of your mouth." Then she reached down and pulled the slimy thing out of his teethless mouth. She got it out, but he fought for it. Just like his Daddy would do.

A/N: Sorry it has been so long, but my computer was acting stupid. Also, I've been getting into astrology a lot lately, so I wanted to bring that into my story, especially since they have to take an astronomy class. I'm not sure they take it in their first year, but I was so into it I had to write it into there. Hope you like this one! Happy reading!


	5. SWWOOOSSSHHH!

Chapter 5: SWWOOOSSSHHH!

"Harry, why can't you just go to sleep?" Lily asked as she looked at her drooling son. His eyes were wide awake and staring with that cute smile on his lips. "I'm not a very good story teller, Harry, and I'm starting to realize how long this tale really is. If you stay awake for the whole thing that means I have to stay awake for the whole thing." Harry giggled with his drooling mouth, causing a sort of gargling sound.

Lily couldn't help it. She couldn't say no to this kid.

"Ok, Harry. I'll keep going. Now my first couple months of first year were all about Animagus's. I lived, and breathed Animagus studies. And believe me, I didn't like it. I had gone to school to learn, not to research for a bunch of silly little boys who couldn't maintain their own curiosity…" Harry gargled out some speech that was incoherent, but Lily seemed to understand him, "I know, Harry Dear, I'm going off on a tangent. What I'm trying to say is that the day I left and went back to the boys they had a surprise waiting for me that was just what the doctor ordered."

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"Lily Evans."

"James Potter."

Sirius and James were lounging in two chairs in the library. Sirius was tilted back on the legs of his chair and James had his feet up on the table. At the sight of Lily they both threw their feet down quickly. Everyone knew that Lily Evans was very precise about everything, especially the upkeep of the Library. Tipping back on chairs was not a way to get on her good side, especially when she looked as crabby as she did just now.

"To spite my better judgment, I have come to help you sods."

James smiled out of the corner of his mouth. He knew he had won.

"Where shall we start this time?"

Sirius and James looked at each other for a long time, then back at her. She was confused and a bit scared, but she said nothing.

"We won't be starting anywhere, Evans," James replied, "today we are going to teach you something."

Lily almost laughed at the prospect. But the boys jumped up and grabbed her by the arms as they escorted her out of the library.

"Er…where are we going guys?" when they didn't answer she got slightly worried. "You know you could get in a lot of trouble for this!"

They both sat her down. "A lot of trouble for what?" James asked with amusement in his eyes.

"For…you know…dragging me off to…" she lowered her voice as their faces got closer, "to have your way with me."

"Ew," the boys said simultaneously. She looked offended. "Are you kidding?" Sirius said. "That's what you think we are doing?" James finished.

"I saw it on the news. Girls get kidnapped everyday by men so that they can have their way with them. And when they are done, do you know what they do?"

"What do they do, oh wise one?"

"They kill them," she responded very seriously.

There was a pause and then the boys busted up laughing. "You're mental," Sirius said. "We're not having our way with you, why, you are a girl, and a weird girl at that."

James looked at Sirius for a long moment and then back at Lily. She seemed unconvinced and scared, but there was nothing he could really do about it. Instead he looked at Sirius again and they nonverbally agreed to the same conclusion. So they both grabbed an arm and started dragging her again.

"Where are we going?" she asked as she was practically clinging to dear life.

"You'll see," the boys said together.

"Oh yes, I'd see alright. And I'll tell you, that while I was incredibly angry, the thing that was to come next practically cured all my ailments."

"We've gotten you a present," James said with a stern face.

"A present?" Lily questioned.

Then Sirius cleared his throat and said, "this" as he thrusted a broomstick into her hands.

"A broomstick?" Lily asked as she looked at the odd object. "Your present is making me clean? Is this some kind of wizarding joke?"

"No! Why would you think that?" James asked.

"Because you are giving me a broom."

"Lily," he said surprising her with her first name again, "do you know so little about the wizarding world?"

He gave her the broom, and then showed that he had one himself. He hoisted his leg over it like it was a horse and then looked back at her.

"Once you are ready I'll count to three." She looked dumbfounded. She supposed she should do what he was doing, so she did. When she looked over at Sirius she saw he was mounted on a broom as well. She thought about and then…

"You can't be serious."

"One, two, three," James said very quickly. By three James and Sirius were in the air, leaving Lily in a cloud of dust. James was doing crazy stunts and Sirius was rushing fast through the air as if racing himself. James tried a silly loop flip that put him closer to the ground where Lily was still standing.

"What are you doing?" he said through the flip. "What's the matter, Lils, never been on a broomstick before?"

She laughed, even though she had no idea why, and then shook her head.

"Sirius, we have a crisis," James said mellow dramatically as he landed on the ground. Sirius followed and covered his face with mock concern. "The lovely lady has never been on a broomstick before."

"A crisis indeed," Sirius said with great emphasis in his voice, as if he had been practicing it.

"Well, we will just have to teach you, won't we?" Then he exchanged a look with Sirius and grinned mischievously.

She frowned. She wasn't exactly sure what this entailed.

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"Then just like that they hoisted me onto the broom and taught me to fly. It's not an easy thing—flying. But I didn't have many problems with it. And your dad…he was amazing," Lily said as she trailed her fingers along her son's jawbone. Harry gargled something out, but Lily was already back into her story.

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Once they were in the air, James was a little more calm and refrained from doing tricks. Lily was very awkward on a broom, but she found it slightly exciting. James tried to let go of her arm, but she seemed to need more help than he would have guessed.

"Gosh, Evans, I would have thought the greatest witch of our age would be a little more nimble on a broomstick."

As she fumbled a bit she tried to talk, "being a good witch doesn't mean you can fly."

She began to gain her bearings and got a grip on the flying thing, which allowed James to let go of her.

"So how long have you known how to fly?" Lily asked trying to make conversation.

He just looked at her with a slight laugh on his face, "basically forever. So tell me, how long have you known you were a witch?"

"Basically forever," she said with a crooked grin. He couldn't help himself; he smiled as well. In order to change the subject Lily broke eye contact and started looking around outside. The greenery was gorgeous and the flowers were all in bloom. Lily felt so alive and, therefore, cheerful. "So…why are we doing this?"

"I wanted to say thanks, I guess," he replied with a weak smile. Behind him Sirius was doing sloppy loops in the air and diving toward the ground, but Lily didn't notice, nor did James.

"Thanks for what?"

"For all the work you've done. That's why I kind of got pushy when I came to see you. I really wanted you to come. I've been planning this all week. I figured you'd probably never flown and it is one of my favorite things. I just thought it would nice to share it with you."

"Thank you," she said with great emphasis. She was very pleased with him in that moment, but then he had to ruin it.

"So why do you care so much about school? I mean, you study more than anyone, it's kind of weird. You start on like that people will think you are a nerd. That's not really a good reputation to have."

She grimaced heavily. He noticed.

"Let me tell you something, Potter, about where I grew up. People didn't fly around on brooms, or swish a wand to wash the dishes." Her tone was very cruel and James could tell this wasn't going to be a good conversation. "You actually had to use your hands, your mouth, and your senses to get things done. I was born under a roof of complete nitwits who thought that the only way to be was their way. Perfect. I wasn't blessed with getting to be born into this. I acquired my talents on my own. I was born to be a witch, but you were born to be a part of this world. I have to get used to it, and until I am I'm going to work my arse off to get it. I'm a muggleborn, as you informed me the first time I met you, and because of that I _have_ to work harder. I have to or I just won't fit in."

James looked at her with a newfound respect but, also, with fear. He realized that he wouldn't be testing her again on the subject. "Well, I was just curious," he said at a loss for words.

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"The rest of the time we were pretty quiet. But it was great fun. I loved it. Not that I would ever play Quidditch, or anything, but I don't mind hopping onto a broom every now and again." She looked down at her son and realized how much he was like his father. "Maybe someday you will be the one doing loops in the sky. I promise we will teach you as soon as we can. You'll get the benefit I never had. And hopefully you will be just like you're Papa."

Baby Harry giggled, and then rolled over as if to go to sleep. Lily gasped. She couldn't believe it, he was actually going to sleep! Then he rolled back over with a toy in his hand. It was a stuffed animal Hippogriff. It always was his favorite. He started sucking on it and then looked up at his mommy in waiting for the next bit of story.

A/N: For some reason the ruler wouldnt work today so I just did dashed lines. This chapter was very fun to write. I hope you guys like it. I wanted to give some background on Lily, and why she never did anything half way. More so, I wanted to explain why any muggleborn would be the way they are, take Hermione for example, she reads so much and works so hard to be perfect, and it isnt a no wonder. She's a muggleborn, and somewhere in her mind that has to play on repeat. She knows (or thinks) that she has to work harder to be even half way equal to the other witches and wizards.

Also, I've continued my whole "Lily-being-involved-in-every-big-piece-of-James'-life" thing. Thats why he took her to fly. Because it was a huge part of who he was, just like it was a huge part of who Harry was. Ok, I'm done. Hope you enjoy it!


	6. Cowardice

Chapter 6: Cowardice

A/N: It gets a little dramatic here, if you can't tell from the title. This is my attempt at a plot line. lol. Hope it works out. Ps. My favorite character appears for the first time!

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"I'm so tired, Harry," Lily said as she lay her face on her hand, which rested on his crib. "How is it you have the energy to be awake all night?" Harry just smiled and giggled, like he always did. Lily rolled her eyes, showing her true age. She had forgotten she was so young whenever she had Harry. But she was. She was very young...

"Ok, Harry. The next part is not so happy. I hate to say it, but I don't think you will be smiling anymore." She looked down at her son hoping to see someone who could sympathize with her. Instead she was faced with someone who smiled, despite himself. Well, she thought, at least he has a sense of humor.

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The next morning Lily Evans found herself waking to a blinking alarm clock that read "8:30". She had planned out her whole day. She would get up, get dressed, go down to breakfast and then meet the boys in the Library, as she had promised. The day before had basically sealed their understanding. She had been so tickled that they had given her such a great gift the day before that she didn't resent them at all for using her knowledge for personal gain. So when she began to head for the Great Hall for breakfast she had more of a spring to her step.

Breakfast was short and sweet, and in true Lily fashion, alone. She didn't really "hang out" with anyone. She knew everyone and enjoyed people's company, but she wasn't the kind of person who needed other people. She was just fine on her own. So, she sat down and ate without talking to one person, which probably made it go faster. After she was done she rushed out of the Great Hall in pursuit of the Library.

She wasn't quite sure why she was so excited to help the boys today. Maybe it was because she finally felt at peace with the boys. Maybe she enjoyed their company enough to call them friends…maybe not. Maybe she…

_That wasn't possible_, she corrected herself before she even allowed the thought to enter her head. That was just silly. And she definitely wasn't the type of girl to replace her last name and then draw hearts around it, especially considering the person.

She slowed down a little after that, but she still made it to the Library by 9:30. When she walked in she greeted the Librarian, a very old lady who looked like she might fall out of the seat with exhaustion, and then proceeded to her favorite table, closest to the books. It was procedure. When she got there, she noticed that neither of the boys was there yet. She decided to take her seat anyway and at least take advantage of the time by pulling out one of her textbooks. She was flipping to a page about werewolves when someone behind her whispered in her ear.

"You spend too much of your time with your nose buried in that thing," the voice said. Lily smiled. James frequently did this to her, and she always came back with a witty comment. She couldn't hold back now.

"Yes, well now you know what your company does to me," she retorted. The voice behind began to laugh quietly, but then she noticed something. James didn't laugh like that.

She turned around to the face of Remus Lupin, a fellow first year with a wicked smile.

"I'm so sorry, Remus, I thought you were—"

"James?"

"Something like that."

He smiled. "I noticed you over here by yourself. I was just wondering if you knew where the dynamic duo was."

"You mean dumb and dumber? They are supposed to be here, but surprise surprise…" she trailed off as she stared into his eyes. He was such a pretty boy.

She had first met Remus in Potions. One Monday morning Remus had been late to class and the only seat left available was next to Lily. They had worked together on a very complicated potion (for a first year, anyway) and they had completed it before anyone else in the room, except Severus Snape, of course. They had made good conversation as well, and Lily found that she liked him. He was sweet, sensitive, and cute. The cute part was what she more often had her mind on.

At this particular moment she was just glad he was paying attention to her.

"Well, if you see them could you tell them I'm looking for them?"

"Of course." With that Remus gave her light pat on the arm and then left. She felt like she was on a cloud.

She got up, thinking that maybe she needed some fresh air, and crossed to the window where she could prop it open and taste the breeze of a lovely English morning. Then she noticed something.

Across the courtyard down where the road became a bridge the boys were standing chatting with some older Gryffindors. She thought maybe she was seeing things, but she had good eyes and the boy standing nearest the Library was definitely wearing old glasses and had unkempt hair. She didn't know whether to be confused or angry. She didn't leave much time for wondering, though, as she rushed out the Library entrance. Her exit shocked quite a few people. Lily Evans leaving the Library before noon? It was ludicrous.

When she found her feet reaching pavement, she started to slow down. The boys that Sirius and James were with were at least third years. She didn't want to go and embarrass herself in front of the wrong people, because however much she said she didn't care about reputations, every prepubescent child does.

So she walked up trying to look cool, but her big smile ruined the effect. She was a shy girl, and as all shy girls do, she got weird when people started looking at her. That was the cause of the silly smile. All the boys turned at once to see the short red haired first year prance toward them.

She recognized a few. One was a kid named Elphias Doge. Another was known as Mundungus Fletcher. The others were unrecognizable—in other words, a bunch of followers. Dung, as they called him, walked right up to her, as if she was interrupting on some secret government affairs.

"Can I help you?" he asked, causing her to feel a little uneasy.

"Could I speak to James Potter?" she asked in a squeaky voice. Dung just looked back with amusement at the one and only James Potter. He had his nose wrinkled up at her, as if disgusted that she would approach him now, but he walked up to her, nonetheless.

"Yes?" he asked, emotion void from his voice.

"I thought the three of us," she said gesturing toward Sirius who seemed very angry at her bringing him into this, "were meeting in the Library this morning?"

"The Library?" Dung blirted out. "She can't be serious, Potter…"

Sirius was the one to pipe in this time. "She was just kidding. Actually, she wanted James—" he said emphasizing that he was not a part of this, "to go out with her."

Both James and Lily blushed, and James gave Sirius a dirty look. Dung just laughed. "Of course, she did. Who wouldn't want the next greatest Gryffindor chaser to be their boyfriend?"

Lily looked at James this time with curiosity. "Is that true? Are you to be a chaser?"

James nodded his head, and looked a little sweeter than before. "Yeah, they just told me."

"He was a shoe-in for sure. Ever since I saw him the other day doing loops in the sky and making crazy dives I realized that he was the guy for the team. The fact that he is a first year means nothing if he can fly that well." Dung smiled sheepishly at Lily and slunked over. "So what did our new chaser say to you, then, girl?"

"Pardon?" she asked completely oblivious.

"When you asked him to go out with you. What did he say?" he said as he nudged 'Gryffindors next greatest chaser'. James' face looked like triumph and it irritated her. He looked as if he was benefiting from her embarrassment. He was smiling while a bunch of older guys made fun of her.

"The same thing you would say in the same situation," she said as she finally gained her inner self again.

"Oh yeah?" he responded.

"Yeah. He said, 'I would love to go out with you, but I'm still too immature and my foot is still way too far up my arse to handle a lady like you.'" All went silent, and then, "Give or take a few words," she added in a few seconds causing all the boys jaws to drop.

"He was right to run away," Dung said straight to her face with malice. "Stupid little muggleborn." At his words most of the crowd looked directly at him with question. They had never heard him say anything that offensive before. James was the only one who didn't look at him. He looked ashamed of himself as his face was downcast. But Lily took it as cowardice. Here she was facing a guy who was blatantly offending her, and he wouldn't even stand up for her. She thought that was what friends did for each other. Then she realized maybe he wasn't her friend after all, or maybe this situation was the reason she didn't have very many friends.

Then, just like that she was gone. She ran away. She ran…and ran…

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"And ran," Lily said to her baby boy. "That was the end to James and Lily. We were done with. From there on out we were enemies. I hated him with all my being, and no amount of apology could mend that. He had been a coward, and he was a Gryffindor! He had ended my friendship with the dynamic duo. I was sad, but his hurt affected me in some good ways too." Harry looked at her curiously as he tugged on either hand of his Hippogriff, as if in anxiousness for the rest of the story.

"The end to our friendship left way for some new friends," Lily said to calm his anxiety. However, Harry was still anxious for more...


	7. Heal Me

Chapter 7: Heal me

"I didn't stop, until my legs were tired. By the time I did, I noticed I had gotten all the way to the astronomy tower. It was a cool day, and the air was wisping through my hair. I'll never forget it," Lily said to her son. She was far away and dreamy sounding, but Harry was gurgling like normal with a silly smile on his face. When she didn't continue Harry looked at her with confusion in his eyes. After a moment, Lily noticed and snapped out of it. She grabbed a strand of her hair and tugged on it as she twisted it within her fingers.

"Well, anyway," she added, "I was just fine by myself, sitting on a rough landing on top of a huge tower, all alone. Then, the most extraordinary thing happened…"

…

"Lily?" a familiar voice said right behind her. She turned and was shocked to see Remus standing there. "What are you doing here?" he added.

She twisted to face him as he sat down beside her, and she prayed there weren't tears on her face. "Oh you know, just checking out the scenery."

"Lily," he said suddenly, "are you crying?"

Great, she thought. "No, I'm not crying…I just," what was she going to say? "I'm not crying." She added quickly.

"What happened?" he asked, unfazed by her lie. And she, being rather forthcoming with Remus, admitted.

"James." She put her head down and cried silent tears.

"Oh Merlin," Remus said putting a comforting hand on the small of her back. "What has he done now?"

Lily went on to tell Remus everything that had happened. Meanwhile, Remus' pity and sympathy grew for this little girl. He didn't understand it, but there was something about the way she told the story that made his face grow more and more sad. Lily tried to ignore it, but she saw the looks he gave her, and rather than feeling angry, like she usually would at someone feeling pity for her, she found it relaxing.

"Well, he's James Potter." Remus tried to cool the situation. "He doesn't really think about anything. He just does stuff. It's stupid, but it's who he is."

Lily looked up at him, "then I want nothing to do with him ever again."

And that one speech did it. It sealed her heart and mind. She was done with James Potter's nonsense. She'd rather spend her time with people who actually cared about her.

Like Remus.

She had to admit he was cute. Not exactly her type, but cute. And when it comes to 11 year old girls, how cute their guy friends are actually does matter, even if only in some corner of their minds. Lily was an example of the latter. She never thought about wanting cute friends, but when she looked at Remus she knew it was definitely a plus.

The problem was she didn't really know this guy, and he didn't really know her. They were just thrown together in a moment of hysteria. But maybe that was enough to make friends. Lily didn't really know, she hadn't really ever had friends.

"Why don't we go to the Great Hall together? I'm sure food will cheer you up," he checked his watch, "it's almost dinner time."

She smiled. So he put out his hand to take hers. And she very graciously took it.

…

When she got to the Great Hall, she actually found that she was smiling again. Remus was great company and had so many stories to tell. He was very shy, though, almost as if he felt he didn't deserve her attentions, but he did. Lily was sure that the person who wasn't deserving in this situation was her. She was so happy for the first time in what felt like ages, and then they walked in the doors to the Great Hall.

For a second she was okay, but then she remembered who she would see at dinner. Her face fell. Remus noticed and tried to coach her into walking. "It's okay, Lily. You'll be fine."

They walked along the aisle between Gryffindor's table and Ravenclaw's. Every step took them closer to the spot Lily always sat for dinner. She wouldn't be sitting there today, because she knew who would be there. As she approached her seat, she found something absolutely extraordinary. Potter wasn't sitting there, nor was Black. They were sitting a little farther down the table.

And they were laughing!

They were talking to the Quidditch team and laughing at Potter's jokes. Lily was infuriated. So, she would get to sit in her regular seat, but it seemed that no apology was going to come her way.

Dinner was not a very good idea.

"So I ate some pumpkin pie and dreamt of what an apology would be like from your father. I imagined what he would say or what he would do. But the truth is, your father is charming, but not very apologetic. He doesn't realize when people need it the most, nor does he ever see his own faults. That day, when he hurt me, was just another day for him. In his mind, the world was in a perfect place." Lily finished and looked down and Harry once more. His eyes were bright and swimming. Those green eyes were so intense, so much more than her own. In those orbs she saw intellect, humor, fearlessness, and sympathy. He was an amazing blend of his parents. She was glad he didn't get the bad things, though she knew they would pop up eventually: Lily's temper, and James' carelessness. They were in there somewhere.

Harry giggled, and then she saw another trait of her husband: mischief.

A/N: Okay, I do a lot of character stuff in here for a while. Most of it is like what you see in that paragraph above. It's Lily telling us what he was like. I hope you enjoy it. The next chapter is my favorite. I know this one is short, but the next one is done, for the most part and it is really really long. I hope you like this! I'll try to get the next one up soon! Thanks guys and dolls!


	8. Later

Chapter 8: Later

A/N: I have to tell you a story about my morning yesterday. The night before, I submitted chapter 7, and then by the next morning, I checked my mail and was shocked to see that my story already had TEN reviews! So I just have to say, Reviewers, YOU ROCK!

Disclaimer: Somewhere far away from where I am, JK Rowling is sitting behind a computer screen twiddling her thumbs saying "IT'S MINE! ALL MINE!" And you know what?…She's right.

Lily was so tired, she needed to replenish. So she picked up her little boy and walked down to the kitchen where she could make herself a cup of coffee. Lily yawned as they went, and Harry imitated her, for no reason at all. "Oh, now you are tired, huh?" she asked her little boy. He just looked up at her and smiled a wide giddy grin of gums. "I didn't think so."

They went down the stairs and Lily patted his bottom along the way. He was being noisy for such a quiet house, but as it was they were the only ones there. James was elsewhere and the boys had a place together closer to the Ministry. It had been a while since she had seen Remus or Peter, but Sirius came over almost everyday. He loved baby Harry almost as much as his parents, but such a thing was inevitable for he was a very cute kid. Everyone fell in love with his chubby cheeks and twinkling bright eyes. He was a gorgeous blend of his parents, and they were extraordinarily good-looking, though Lily herself would never admit she was.

They got closer to the kitchen and Harry started to get rowdy. He was gurgling and tugging on Lily's hair. One tug hurt a little more than the others, but he didn't stop until she finally let out an "ow!" Then, they both had each other's attention. She looked down at her little boy as her eyes started to water from the pain of almost losing some of her hair to her son's grip.

One thing was better, though. She was wide awake. She decided she didn't really need the coffee anymore, so she looked at the empty coffee machine that was just across her in the kitchen…and turned her back to it. As she scaled back up the stairs her son started to get restless in her arms.

"Well, I guess you'd probably like the next bit of the story, huh?"

He giggled and wiggled his feet at her.

"All right then."

…

After the incident on the grounds of Hogwarts, and the top of the tower extravaganza, time went by as usual in the world of Lily Evans. She grew up in shoe size each year just as much as in height and mind. Soon Lily was considered the best witch of her year. She became a charms master and a pretty quick wit. Some other things came to her as well. After her first year, Lily got a present that made her world go upside down. Soon after, she was no longer a little girl, but a growing adolescent. She was developing faster than most girls her age. This did not become apparent to her until she went back to school.

She hadn't realized it fully until one day she was sitting in her room with some of her girl mates. One girl, named Isabelle, was looking at herself in the mirror with a scowl on her face. When Lily questioned her about it, she turned around and rudely responded, "Well, not everyone gets boobs when they're 12!"

That was about the time that Lily started noticing everything about her body. Not just how the girls reacted, but the boys as well. She would walk down the halls and get whistled at by the boys in her year. And as time went on, even the older guys began to whistle. Not that she was that pretty, after all she had ginger hair and freckles, but she did have curves. Sometimes she found that it was a plus, but more often she found it just annoying. This began to wear away, of course, as all things do to young people, and Lily could once again feel like a normal person.

One thing that did change permanently was Lily's inability to find lasting friendships. James, she had realized, was no friend whatsoever. This hit her once she started hanging out with Remus more often. It was kind of a strange situation considering Remus was a Marauder, but somehow it never seemed to contradict. Remus just handled both friends very well. But Lily couldn't help wondering, while Remus was calming her about some other offense Potter made, how he would treat the situation if the places were switched. It kind of seemed like a dual situation, but both friends liked him too much to take it out on him.

Lily particularly liked him. She had grown out of the 'thinking-he-was-cute' phase and now saw him as more of a brother figure. They talked to each other about everything. They did their homework together, helped each other out when they needed it, and even told gossip to each other, more often Lily than Remus.

Their friendship had also led the way to new friendships for Lily. She became great friends with several girls in her room including Alice Walker, Emmeline Vance, and Marlene McKinnon. She had even gotten close to Frank Longbottom, who always seemed to trail after Alice everywhere. Most of the time she was either with the girls or with Remus, but occasionally they could all be found together.

As the years went by Lily kept growing up, in so many ways. She learned a great deal of compassion, and kindness that separated her from most of her classmates, and drew people to her. She began to stand up for people who couldn't stand up for themselves; most often it was younger children who were being terrorized by Slytherins. This trait became very helpful in her fifth year whenever she became a prefect.

Her hard work had finally paid off, when she had gotten the badge in her Hogwarts letter. Her parents had actually understood and been ecstatic about it. That year was one of her favorites at Hogwarts, for while the Dark Lord was growing in power, she was learning traits that could help her in the outside world to fight against him.

Of course, not all was sunshine and daisies in the world of Lily Evans. She still had to deal with a certain unexplainable prat. She called him Potter, the rest of the world called him God, and she detested it. If there was one place where her patience and compassion could fail, it was in him.

The years had not been good to Potter. He got a big head after he joined the Quidditch team, and soon after the girls began to flock to him like he was fresh meat. After all, he had a great deal of talent, and he was charming as hell, if he had been even half as good-looking as he was the girls would have been falling all over him. He also began to lose pity for those below him, and pranking became his outlet for attention. Along with Black, who had grown so incredibly gorgeous that even Lily couldn't deny it, they began to prank the school. They started off with mean Slytherins, trying to make a statement about the power of Gryffindor, but eventually resorted to pranking anyone who came within a 40 mile radius. It was getting so bad, that Lily found herself on many occasions stepping in.

At first, he had simply ignored her, but as she grew up and began taking people's attention away from him, for positive reasons like protecting people from his jinxes, he began to take an interest. It started in their fourth year. He had started flirting with her, hoping that she would fall on her knees like all the other girls did. But when she showed him nothing but disdain he realized she was a different kind of girl, and it intrigued him.

All through their fourth year, and fifth year Lily had warded off all his advances. One time she actually recalled with perfect clarity was when the Marauders had depantsed their favorite victim Severus Snape. She had, of course, jumped in, but when Lily entered the picture Potter began to show off and taunt Snape even worse. When he had called her a mudblood Lily thought Potter's look would have killed him. However much she had appreciated his concern, it could never make up for his behavior in the first year, nor excuse hurting a fellow student.

All of his advances had been for naught, and all because he had made the biggest mistake he could in the face of Lily Evans.

Next thing Lily knew she was a sixth year, and nothing felt sweeter, smelt sweeter or tasted sweeter. She was as happy as a lioness at a meat sale. She had received high marks on all her OWLS, and had, in fact, gotten 9 OWLS. Remus and Potter had each gotten 8, and Black had gotten 7, but no one else could even rival her 9. She was a huge success, and she was sure that she was going to love another year as a prefect.

She was on her way to Hogwarts for another year. The car ride was silent, but she didn't care. She had gotten a new book for her 16th birthday, which had only been the day before. It was Jane Austen's _Emma_. It was her mother's old copy from her Master's studies at University. She was passing it on to Lily because she knew how much Lily adored Jane Austen. She didn't know whether it was the romance or the strong female characters, but she loved her writing.

When they reached King's Cross, she had already gotten to the part where Frank Churchill arrived unbeknownst to everyone. However, she was so close to leaving now that she actually had to pay attention to her family. Petunia had not come with them, for obvious reasons, but her mother and father were smiling despite their uncomfortable posture. She didn't know why they still felt foreign here, even after all these years.

"Thanks, Mum, thanks, Dad. I really appreciate this gift. It was very thoughtful of you."

Her mother was smiling with glee, "I should have known that spending no money would be more fruitful than a hundred million Euros. You haven't taken your face out of that book for a second since we left home."

"Well, Mum a hundred million Euros would have been pointless; we don't use them in the Wizarding World. I doubt they'd even know what one was. Besides, it's the thoughtful gifts that count. I wouldn't give up ten beautiful moments for a thousand Galleons."

Her parents didn't understand what a Galleon was, but they understood her sentiment all the same. They bent down and hugged her and then let her go.

She was right on her way. Her parents seemed so proud. After she passed through the barrier, she tucked her book into her jacket pocket and then hoisted her trunk onto the train. It took a little effort but she had done it all the same. She was used to the weight of all her books. She was just about to get on herself when she noticed her jacket was lighter. She reached into her pocket and found that her book wasn't there. She must have missed her pocket when she was trying to tuck it in. She turned around and was about to go looking for it, when she saw a messy haired boy bend down and pick it up.

"Lose something, Evans?" James Potter looked just as he had always looked, albeit a little taller and muscular. He was smiling his obnoxious grin and looking at her out of two perfect hazel eyes. She was infuriated.

He looked down at the title just as she had almost tore it out of his grip. She was so embarrassed. She knew he would tease her about this, just as he teased her about everything. She recalled one night in particular when she had been reading up on astronomy.

"Jane Austen?"

She cleared her throat to cool her embarrassment, "got a problem with it?"

"No, it's just a little elitist of you."

"Elitist?"

"Yeah, reading Jane Austen for fun is like reading Shakespeare for fun."

"What is wrong with reading Shakespeare for fun?"

"Nothing, if you're a highfalutin elitist."

"Excuse me?" she began, but before she could really get angry, Potter broke back in.

"But you aren't an elitist. That's why it doesn't make sense."

"Why does reading Shakespeare make me an elitist?"

"Well, duh, no one enjoys reading that stuff for real." He made a face like it was obvious, but Lily was not buying into it.

"I actually do like reading Shakespeare and Jane Austen…for fun," she said sarcastically as if she was talking to a three year old. He just gave her a look that said "whatever, I don't really care" and then started walking away.

"Oh by the way, Evans, you look even cuter than last year."

She turned full circle to face him, gave him a mean face and then said, "No, Potter, good try, but no."

He knew what she was saying no to. But it only made him smile in anticipation for what came next.

"I used to think I hated arrogant prats, but I married one, so I must have been mistaken," that was all Lily had to say about that. It made her son giggle all the same.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the dark outside the room, barely even a shadow, something seemed to move, but neither Lily Evans, nor her baby boy noticed.

A/N: Sorry this is so short! Ok, there is a lot to say about this chapter. First, I thought this was my favorite chapter, but actually I forgot this chapter was written. I've been looking at chapter 9 (I wrote them at the same time, they kind of go together.) So, sorry about that. But I also wanted to address a couple things really important! The "she wasn't really that pretty" thing was something I threw in there because she sounded too perfect, and I didn't like it, but I figured it would work anyway, because she is telling the story and sometimes her opinions are allowed to leak into the flash backs. Lol.

Also, I'm obsessed with Astrology, so I made Lily a Virgo, and you will see in the next chapter that I made James a Leo. If you are curious how that ties in, research the two signs. I'll give you one thing, though, the symbol for Leo is the Lion, and for Virgo it's the Virgin Maid. That should give some clues about what I'm doing with the characters.

PS. I personally love reading Shakespeare and Jane Austen for fun...lol.


	9. Charms, Books and a Nimbus

Chapter 9: Charms, Books, and a Nimbus.

Disclaimer: Still twiddling her thumbs... it's not mine...

"Getting on the Hogwarts Express did finally happen for your information," Lily said to her staring son. Somehow she had taken the look as accusatory but in reality, Lily was just having so much fun she had almost forgotten she was telling a story for her newborn baby.

"Mind you I almost missed it, thanks to an insufferable prat. But I got on, and found my friends in no time."

The thing outside the door seemed to move again, but this time it seemed as if it was sitting.

…

"Lily!" It was Marlene. Her long beautiful blonde hair seemed even longer this year, and as always she had it up in high pigtails, with two strands at either side hanging loose. She sat closest to the window, and beside her sat a very quiet Emmeline Vance who was fluffing her short curly hair with one hand and reading the Daily Prophet with the other. Across from them sat Alice and Frank. Alice was obliviously playing with a piece of hanging string from her skirt, which looked new. But Frank was not interested in the string. He was more interested in her intense blue eyes and flowing brown hair. They all looked exceptional, apparently everyone was excited for the new year.

Everyone greeted her as soon as she sat down and then she got a good look at everyone. Before long they were talking about the latest fashions and gossip.

"Alice, is that a new skirt?"

"Yeah, it is," she said looking grateful that someone noticed. "It matches my vest, see?" she asked as Lily noticed that indeed it did match her old vest, which she wore at least once a week every week. When Lily questioned her about in third year, she said that she liked the way it accentuated her curves. Lily had laughed at the time, for Alice had been a slow developing girl. But now, Lily couldn't deny, it did in fact bring out her small waist and cute hips.

Meanwhile, Emmeline was commenting on Marlene's new sweater. "It's all the rage now, Emmeline," Marlene was saying. "I hear that in a few years everyone is going to be wearing them." Emmeline just rolled her eyes. Who would ever be caught in a long sweater that hung off one shoulder and was long enough you could bind a belt over it? But she said nothing, of course, especially since Marlene was almost always right about fashion.

"So how was your summer, Lily?" Emmeline asked to get away from Marlene's rants, "You are the only one I didn't see over the break." Everyone seemed to perk up at her question. No one had seen Lily, she was a muggleborn and her parents weren't too keen on letting her go and stay at Wizard's families no matter how nice they seemed on the platform twice a year. Plus they didn't have floo powder. Her only outlet was her owl, but that didn't help now.

"Well, we went to the south of France for a month. That was pretty cool." Everyone seemed very interested, but Lily changed the subject. "And then, of course, my birthday was yesterday…"

They all went red at once, except Frank. "Oh Merlin's beard!" he said with a laugh, "You all forgot didn't you?" He then proceeded to pull out a package from his trunk. "Happy Birthday, Lily, sorry I'm not very good at wrapping."

No, he wasn't, Lily thought as she looked at the parcel. It was very badly wrapped indeed, and she doubted she would ever get through all the tape. She started to open it, and then someone took her hand. She looked up and it was Marlene.

"I am so sorry, Lily!" she said as if nothing else in the world was more important than remembering a birthday. "I can't believe I forgot (me either, Emmeline said in the background) I'll get you something on our first Hogsmeade visit (me too, Emmeline said again)."

Lily told them it was okay and then finished opening her present. When she had it completely opened she saw that it was a beautiful bracelet with charms on it. "Get it? It's a _charms_ bracelet" Frank said. It was no secret to anyone that Lily's favorite subject was Charms and she found the play on words rather cute.

"Frank, you shouldn't have…" she trailed off, barely being able to think of how much it must have cost.

"Don't worry about it, it wasn't that expensive, and Remus pitched in. Said you would find it rather funny, the play on words I mean."

She had to admit, the boy was good. As if on cue, Remus entered the compartment, but he looked rather put out.

"I swear, Lily, this was not my idea," he said, and then Lily noticed some other people at the door.

Potter. Black.

"What are you doing here?" she asked as Remus sat down and Potter's face was clearly visible to everyone in the compartment.

"Hey, Evans, I was just outside in the hall talking about my new birthday present." Lily rolled her eyes at his ridiculousness. "When I saw you and your crew, I figured I'd come share."

"So, what is it then?" Emmeline asked, looking anxious as always when Lily and James were face to face.

"I'm glad you asked," he said as he whipped something out from behind him. It was a broomstick. "A Nimbus 1990," he finished.

Everyone gawped at it, but Lily just sat where she was with her arms crossed. "That's not a Nimbus 1990."

Everyone turned and looked at her like she was insane, especially Potter. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"You heard me, it's not a Nimbus 1990."

"What makes you say that?"

"They don't come out for another month."

"Well, so, my father has connections."

"Not that big of connections, they don't even start producing them until September 22."

Everyone looked at her in awe. "How do you know that?" Potter asked, more annoyed this time.

"Duh," Frank said, drawing unwanted attention at that moment. Her grew quieter as he continued on because of all the mean stares. "Lily knows everything."

Lily just shook her head. "Actually I read it in the Daily Prophet, they had an ad in there for it. And in the small print it said they wouldn't start production until September 22. Now tell me, Potter, how long have you had that broom?"

"Since my birthday, July 30th."

"Well, Potter, unless your parents have some sort of time traveling device that is simply impossible."

Black opened his mouth to continue the argument for Potter, but almost every time Black decided to start arguing Potter was done with hearing it. James waved his hand at Sirius, and then sat down beside Lily. No one said anything, nor dare to defy James Potter, only Lily ever dared make him seem like a fool. Everyone else was afraid he'd put a hex on them or something. Instead, they all acted like nothing had happened.

James tried to put his arm around her as Sirius sat down beside Marlene and Remus sat down beside Emmeline. Lily, however, was not swooning nearly as much as the other two girls. In fact, Lily was doing everything in her power to get him to leave. She pushed him rather hardly toward Frank, and then he noticed the bracelet.

"Speaking of presents," he said as he gawped at it. "Where did this one come from?"

"It's a charms bracelet."

"That's cute," Potter said, as he obviously understood the pun.

"She got it from Remus and Frank for her birthday," Alice said, as she was just now noticeable from the other side of Frank. Everyone closed their eyes at her error.

"Excuse me?" Potter said as his anger built up. "You two were getting my girl jewelry?"

"I'm not your girl, Potter," Lily said barely audible now. Potter was fuming.

"And you of all people Remus? I thought you said you were friends, friends don't give each other jewelry."

"Sure, they do," Lily said, this time much louder. "Didn't you tell Marlene last year that the heart pendant you gave to that Ravenclaw Leanne was just a friendly gesture?"

Marlene looked at him with disgust. She couldn't believe she had actually dated him. At least that was what her face said at that moment.

"That's different," he said rounding on her.

"I don't think it is, and I'm sure Marlene doesn't think it is either." Both girls were enjoying making him uncomfortable now. Marlene was infuriated, Lily was smiling.

"That's not the point, I really came here to give you this." He pulled out a parcel. It was shaped like a book, but she doubted he would have the insight to do such a thing. "Happy birthday," he said and then stormed out looking hurt for the first time in a long time. Lily was stunned. James Potter was never bothered by anything. Not in this way anyway. He never got upset or hurt. He would get angry, oh yes, but not sad. That seemed like a foreign emotion to James Potter.

But here he had actually looked sad. And she felt bad. For the first time, she felt bad for James Potter.

…

Lily wouldn't open the parcel until she got back to Hogwarts. She was afraid to. Despite her friends begging her to open it, she didn't. She waited until everyone was asleep in their beds, so she could deal with her emotions on her own.

She was sitting on her bed in her pajamas. Her hair was in two plaits, just like her mum used to do for her when she was little. Everything was normal, except that she was opening a birthday present in the middle of the night with her curtain pulled and her fuzzy slippers still on.

She reached down with shaking hands and pulled the ribbon free. As it fell so did the card that was attached. It read:

_Just thought you might like to know that your hard work wasn't for nothing. _

She looked at it curiously. What could he mean? Then, she ripped open the paper and found a picture lying on top. It was a picture of a stag and a dog. They were cute little animals. The dog was scruffy and cute. The stag was elegant and gorgeous. As she looked closer she saw they were moving very uncharacteristically for their forms. The dog was actually waving. And the stag was bowing. She looked closer and noticed that the stag had very pretty hazel eyes.

OH MY GIDDY AUNT!

They had done it? It seemed impossible. Maybe they were smarter than she thought. But when had they done it? What had happened? She was about to jump up and down with excitement, but then remembered that this was James Potter she was talking about.

_Ew_, she thought. She tried her best to shake it off, but then noticed there was something else with the picture. It was a red book with gold lettering.

She almost laughed full out when she saw the title.

Collected Works of Aristotle

And something had been magiced on just below the title. She giggled as she read the gold lettering:

_Old Dead Guy_

She didn't know what to think, or what to say. It didn't matter, though, because she was out of bed faster than a hyena chasing its prey.

…

Lily was tearing up now, as she thought back to it. "I had never gotten anything so sweet or funny in my young life before. It was special, like every gift your Daddy gives me now is special. He understands me like no one else does, even when he isn't paying attention."

Harry giggled again, and reached out his hands for his mommy. She gave him her finger and he was satisfied to suck on it instead. At the door, the figure actually leaned its head onto the doorway.

A/N: I just had the worst morning ever, so I decided to make myself happy by submitting my favorite chapter. I hope you guys enjoy it! The end was my favorite part. Oh, and my description of the characters that are friends with Lily is from my own idea, and I have this really cool candy doll thing that I made to illistrate it. Ps. Anyone checked out stuff about Virgos and Leos? If you want to know some stuff, I can hook you up (that sounds funny coming from me). Thank you guys and galls!


	10. Girlfriend?

Chapter 10: Girlfriend?

Disclaimer: JK Rowling is not me. So there.

"I actually went to his room. I swear, I was not thinking. Had anyone, but him opened the door, the gossip would have been spreading around Hogwarts faster than Peeves's stink bombs." Lily made a face that showed she did not like the sound, or the smell, of that. Harry began to giggle uncontrollably at his mother's silly face. Then he grabbed his feet and proceeded to knock them against each other until his mother continued the story.

"However," she began again, "he did answer the door."

…

It had started as a simple yes, but once he saw who was at the other side of the door, James Potter's introduction that night mutated into something more akin to a nervous scream.

"Yea—ahhh!" he said once the door was completely open.

But she was smiling, and there seemed to be slight tears in her eyes. He seemed to have no idea what she was doing at his door, but he decided to take the opportunity to flaunt his bare chest.

"Yes, Evans?"

Okay, it was hot. She could admit it, but that wasn't what she was here for. She was here to say thank you. So before Potter could say another word, she threw her arms around him and embraced him tightly. At first he didn't know how to react as his hands hung limp, but then he embraced her as well. And he was taking deep breaths very close to her head.

Was he smelling her hair?

As they parted, neither seemed to be sure what to say. Potter was rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous way, and Lily was blushing probably twenty shades of red.

"I just wanted to say thank you," she said finally. He looked up at her and stared into her eyes, making her feel very mushy inside.

"Oh, you opened it, then? I didn't think you would." They left it at that. Neither wanted to bring up what had happened all those years before. It was kind of an uncomfortable situation to be in. But they didn't need to say anymore, the gift spoke for itself, and her hug explained itself, as well.

Lily cleared her throat and then turned to go back to her room, "Bye, Potter," she said in a rather husky voice.

But before she fully turned away he called her back with a question. "Vanilla?" he asked, as if she would know what he meant, but she didn't.

"Huh?"

"Your shampoo. Is it vanilla?"

She smiled in response. He was kind of cute when he looked so vulnerable. His eyes were bright and twinkling, and his lips were pouty. She turned back around to leave, but stopped when she remembered something.

"Oh and Potter?" she wasn't shocked when she saw that he hadn't moved an inch since she had turned around. He just raised his eyebrows to her question. "Put a shirt on."

He smirked, but she refrained until she turned back around and started to walk away.

…

The next day they had their first classes. Lily was so excited to start her new studies. She would have DADA, Charms, Potions, Transfiguration, Arithmancy, and Astronomy. It was quite the load for a 6th year, but she didn't mind. She loved her lessons, and loved her homework (though she kept that to herself, in case of teasing).

Classes weren't very interesting the first day, as usual, but they did have homework already in Charms. They had to develop their own cloaking charm. Lily finished hers by lunch time.

It was after classes that the school began to get interesting. Apparently, the first Hogsmeade weekend was posted. It was at the end of the month.

Of course, the school loved their Hogsmeade weekends, not only because they got to shop and eat sweets, but because they got to go on dates. Asking someone to go with you to Hogsmeade was equivalent to someone asking you to go to the cinema in the muggle world. Lily had found that out the hard way when she had promised to go to Hogsmeade with a Ravenclaw boy in her third year. the result was a great deal of gossip flying around about her dating him. He was the biggest part of the problem, since he wouldn't stop trying to kiss her the whole date.

This year she was kind of hoping that Remus would ask her. For the most part she just considered Remus a friend, but she wouldn't mind being more. He was cute, and sweet, and he had gotten her a very thoughtful birthday gift. Of course, someone else had as well, and she prayed he wouldn't be asking her.

Oddly enough, actually, it was already the afternoon and he hadn't asked her once. That seemed like a very strange occurrence for James Potter. He always asked her. She was musing over it as she sat down in the courtyard. She was not alone very long, however, as she saw something that finally put the world back into order. James Potter was heading straight for her. He ran his hand through his hair, and smiled charmingly at her as he approached. He was about 4 feet away, when someone else jumped in the way of Lily's view.

"Hi, Lily," it was a seventh year Hufflepuff named Amos Diggory. He was…in a word…gorgeous. Lily began to blush, but tried her hardest not to giggle and smile goofily. She had a habit of doing that around cute guys.

"I was just wondering, Lily, if you wanted to go to Hogsmeade with me?"

Lily almost fell off the bench she was sitting on. Possibly the hottest guy in school had just asked her out!

She was just about to say yes, or something like it, when butthead broke in.

"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing asking my girlfriend to Hogsmeade?" Everything went silent in the courtyard. Everyone turned to see what was going on, and when they saw Lily and James, they were immediately intrigued.

"Excuse me?" Lily asked.

"I'm sorry, Lily, I probably shouldn't have been that mean, but how dare he ask you to Hogsmeade when we are dating."

"Potter, we aren't dating."

He looked incredibly confused. "But what about last night? You…you hugged me…"

"But did I say 'Potter, we are dating'?" She said as if she was talking to a little child, which sometimes, she had to admit, talking to James Potter _was_ like talking to a little child.

"Erm…" he said as if thinking back, "when?"

She let out a breath in frustration, "last night, Potter."

"Er, well…no, not exactly, but you did hug me!"

"I was saying 'thank you' not 'marry me'."

"Ew," James said before he thought about it. Lily looked very angry at that moment. "No, I mean…" he didn't know what he meant, and her face wasn't getting any less grave. "God, Lily, I am so un-James-ish around you!" He said angrily.

"Un-James-ish?" she asked in between his banter.

"I swear I can't be charming if my life depended on it, when you are around! It drives me crazy!"

"Well, then go away!" she said back with equal anger in her voice. It shocked him a bit, actually, because he began to step back. "If I drive you crazy, then what are you still doing here?"

And that ended it once again. James ran off and Lily felt bad, as usual.

…

Lily was laughing now. She couldn't help laughing at his words and her own. She looked at her little boy and he hadn't even cracked a smile. "Okay, maybe it isn't that funny. But the look on his face was." She smiled again, and continued her story.

A/N: I just started school yesterday, and I have so much homework I can't even tell you! The next chapter is mostly finished now, but after that it is going to be really hard to submit regularly. I hope you gals and guys don't abandon me. I promise I will get to the end soon enough to finish it. I know exactly what I want the end to be. I just have to get there. Anyway, thanks everyone who has supported me this far, I hope you guys are happy with this new chapter!


	11. I've Changed

Chapter 11: "I've Changed"

Disclaimer: It may be longer than most of my stuff, but I wrote it. Unfortunately, I don't own it. Props to the Magic Master--Rowling! (That's for the the non-ganstas who hate hearing it all the time--i.e. ME! Cheers...and some chocolate on top)

"The next morning was even better, Harry. Your daddy went out on a limb that day, and did something he had never done before." Harry looked curious, as she continued her story. "Wait till you hear this one, Harry."

…

The sky was a pretty baby blue color. The wind was whipping at a steady speed, and the black lake's running waters was the only sound to Lily's ears. She was reading her Jane Austen novel and walking to Arithmancy. She decided to take the more scenic route through the courtyard to class. It was very early and not many people were outside the castle. Lily was more than pleased at the fact. After yesterday's incident everyone had been gossiping and asking her questions, and everywhere she went people whispered about her. She decided peace and quiet was in order, even if only for a while.

She was just about to reenter the castle when someone behind her called her name. "Evans!" Only one person called her Evans. She turned around and saw a very winded James Potter running up beside her. Lily felt her cheeks growing warm, but she had no idea why.

James smiled when he reached her. He was out of breath and his cheeks were flushed, which gave him a very young look. Any other girl might have been falling all over herself, but not Lily. Lily would never…

"Problblblem, Potter?" She ruffled her eyebrows. She had not just done that. Well, maybe he wouldn't notice.

"No, no problblblem, Evans," he looked down and then back up at her shyly. "I just wanted to talk to you. I was on my way to the Great Hall for breakfast, and I saw you outside the window. I ran as fast as I could."

Lily just looked at him, confused. She didn't know what to say, but her mouth was open before she even thought about it. "You missed breakfast for me, I mean… to talk to me?"

"More or less, Evans," he smirked his award winning smile, and Lily blushed heavily. He really was…cute…but he was such a jerk! "I wanted to tell you how sorry I was for yesterday."

Well, there goes the jerk part.

Lily just stared at him. She wasn't sure how long she just sat there like that, but it must have been a while because James actually had to call her name. Then, he reached over and closed her mouth that had somehow ended up open. Then, he smiled again, but this time his smile looked genuine. He seemed to age greatly in that one gesture.

"Are you okay, Evans?"

At his words she shook out of it and tried her best at coherent conversation. "Oh, yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I be?" She said it all really fast and nervously, which seemed to make Potter even calmer. Somehow they had switched personalities in this conversation.

"Anyway," he continued with a laugh, "I just wanted to say that my behavior was inappropriate and wrong. I misunderstood and it made you look silly. I'm sorry."

She couldn't help it, she actually smiled, and swooned a little bit. "Thanks, I mean, that's really sweet of you," she said as she shifted from one foot to the other. She giggled a little and leaned into James. His face looked confused, but entertained. Then something happened.

Lily jumped away and straightened up. This was James Potter, for goodness sake. Now that she was back to normal, it seemed that James was as well. He rubbed the back of his neck nervously and shifted on his feet.

"Well, I guess I better get to class, or something," James said.

Lily couldn't look at him, she just uttered an, "uh huh."

Then James made a move to leave, but before he went he nervously shifted on his feet and then leaned into Lily. Quickly, but sweetly he kissed her forehead, and then began walking away.

She called his name right before he was gone. He turned around quickly as if in anticipation. "There's hope for you yet," she said. He smiled widely and then walked away.

She was smiling like silly again.

…

Later that afternoon after everyone was done with classes and heading to the Great Hall for dinner, Lily was just beginning to act normal again. She hadn't seen Potter since Transfiguration, so she had Astronomy to get over the things that occurred that morning.

Now she was laughing with Marlene and Emmeline as they talked about Hogsmeade.

"I can't believe you are going to Hogsmeade with Sirius," Emmeline was saying to Marlene with jealousy heavy in her voice. "He is so hot! Promise you will tell me every detail?"

"Emmeline, you are going to be there practically the whole time. You are going with Peter, remember?"

"Don't remind me." They were sitting down at their usual spots in the Great Hall.

"So how did that happen anyway?" Lily was asking as someone walked up and interrupted them.

"Hey, Lily." It was Amos Diggory again. The other two girls just stared with open mouth. Everyone knew that Amos Diggory was the most sought after guy at Hogwarts, and he was talking to Lily. "I was just wondering if you had thought about what I said the other day."

Lily went red, and her friends shot her questioning glances. She hadn't told them about yesterday. She had been too distracted by the million questions they asked about Potter. "Er…well, no I hadn't thought about it," she said to Amos. His face fell a little, but then Lily realized what she was saying. She couldn't honestly make that face sad. "But, now I've thought about it. And, yes, Amos. I would love to go to Hogsmeade with you."

Both girls at the table squealed loudly, and Amos' face lit up brilliantly. "Okay, then, I'll meet you outside your common room at noon." Then, he walked away, but not before he took Lily's hand and kissed it gently.

All the girls swooned, including Lily. After he had gotten distance between them, the girls immediately broke into questioning. "How did this happen?" "When did you and Amos become a thing?" and a million other questioned were thrown at her. It was fun for a while, until a group of guys came and joined there party.

"What's so funny?" Sirius Black asked as he sat down beside Marlene.

"Yeah, Lily you look like you just got smacked with a silly stick," Remus said, and sat down between Emmeline and Marlene. Peter came up right at his heals and sat down on Emmeline's other side. Lily was a bit distracted before she noticed another person sitting down beside her.

"Lily could we talk?" When she turned around she was shocked to see Potter standing there. He had called her Lily, and actually asked her nicely. It seemed strange, but he must have changed somehow.

Almost in a daze, she nodded her head. When he reached out to take her hand, she really felt like she was in a foreign place. The rest of the table was whispering and giggling to each other, but Lily was distracted by the gold flecks in his eyes.

He was staring so strongly and determinedly that Lily was nearly scared to know what could make James Potter, silly boy, so serious. They walked away mechanically as James looked at the floor as if in concentration. His face was void of emotion, but his eyes were alive with thought. Lily tried not to stare at him, but she couldn't help it. Once they reached the doors she was thrown out of her study when he looked directly into her eyes. Apparently he hadn't noticed her staring at him before, because now he seemed shocked and his face seemed to ask a question Lily didn't know how to answer.

"Are you okay?" he asked before they left the Great Hall.

She gulped down her embarrassment and then tried to answer, "uh huh," but it came out as more of a grunt.

James smiled at her and then let her pass before him. As she went she noticed a big masculine hand slip up to the small of her back. He was ushering her through the door…

Like a Gentleman…

Weird, Lily thought.

Once they were outside the Great Hall and in the busy corridor outside, he once again took her arm and drug her off to another location.

"Where are we going?" Lily asked as they turned out of one corridor into another.

He just kept walking, determined to find the right location. When he finally did, it took Lily some time to readjust. He simply stopped in the middle of an empty corridor lined with huge glass windows. Lily tried to look him in the eyes but he was still staring at the floor as if he was trying to sort something out in his mind.

All at once they both seemed to make a decision to speak and what resulted was a jumble of words.

"Is something wrong, Potter?" and "Lily, I really like you," came out together. The result was silence. It seemed that James' face was redder than Lily's hair in that moment. They just stared paralyzed with fear to say anything else. Lily's heart was pounding, and she was sure her face was white as a ghost. James was breathing heavily and trying to avoid her eyes.

In an effort to regain normalcy, Lily looked back up at James as if he had said nothing and then cleared her throat, "you were saying, Potter?"

He almost died at the look on her face, or at least his face seemed to say so. He flushed white, and then a light shade of blue, and then back to his beautiful bright red. He opened his mouth as if to continue, but his eyes were searching hers for the right words to say. She wasn't helping. She had a steady gaze that revealed nothing of what she was thinking or feeling. Even her eyes were void of answers, all that remained there was a bit of amusement. This didn't help him, however, as he tried to speak coherently and came out with jumbles.

"I was just saying that…well in certain circumstances one realizes that what one was searching for or what one needed was far different from what one wanted, until one realized that what one really wanted was what one needed…" he kept rambling but Lily was completely without a clue as to what he was saying.

When he took a breath, Lily decided to break in, "come again?" she asked and then thought better of it as his face scrunched up in thought.

"Never mind, Potter. But what does this have to do with me?"

"Well, I'm… I'm 'one'."

Lily stared blankly.

"_I_ realized I need you and want you." He seemed to find great difficulty saying the words, but he did. Lily was stuck in his eyes and couldn't breath, and yet he continued. "I like you for real, Lily. I always have, but now I realized why, and how much."

"Potter—" she began but to no avail; he was already speaking again.

"What I'm trying to say is will you go to Hogsmeade with me?" She opened her mouth to respond but he plunged in once again. "Now, I know, what makes today any different than any other time I've asked you to come to Hogsmeade, right? Well, I've changed Lily, I really have!"

Lily tried to cut in with a "Potter," but he was still talking.

"If you still don't want to go with me that is fine, but I just wanted you to know that I'm always here for you Lily. I'm not going anywhere. I want you, no one else."

Lily's heart was pounding but she had to speak to him before he made a fool of himself, or she found it hard to deny him. "Potter—"

"Lily, please just hear me out. Ever since first year, I have looked at you as more than a friend. You are beautiful and funny and smart and everything I want to be—kind, sincere, passionate, hard working. You are everything I hope for and dream of. If you don't believe me, I understand, but please just accept me as your friend, that would be enough for me—"

This time, however, Lily cut him off with a sweet voice, much quieter than she had been before. Something of it must have caught his attention because he snapped out of his rant quickly and went to attention.

Or maybe it was what she said…

"James…" she whispered, and he was immediately paralyzed.

"Did you just call me by my first name?" he seemed confused and awestruck.

She laughed a little at his funny face and then continued without answering his question. "James, thank you for everything you just said. It was…wonderful," she felt her heart skip a beat. "But I need to tell you something that I'm afraid you might not like to hear."

While she spoke the last part the corridor seemed to get louder and slowly James' head raised and looked over her shoulder. She finished her thought, but when he had no dreadful outbursts she figured the commotion must be important, so she turned around. What faced her, a little ways down the corridor, was an out of breath Amos Diggory. His cheeks were rosy and his face was flushed around it from, what seemed to have been, running. He looked even cuter than James had when he was all wind blown and rosy cheeked.

"Lily, there you are," he said as he walked over to them, completely ignoring James. "I forgot to ask if you wanted to go out to eat when we got to Hogsmeade. Maybe we could go to one of those nice restaurants that all the girls seem to love. Or do you just want to go around the shops? I don't care either way."

James had stopped moving completely, though his hands were balling up into fists. Lily stared between the two men, who looked at nothing but her. She was the one who had to give explanations, and answers. She was used to being the person everyone came to for answers, but this was not an ordinary situation. James was staring at her with a little bit of anger but mostly hurt in his eyes. Amos was staring with affection and excitement. Together they made for one rollercoaster of emotions in Lily.

"Amos, could we talk later," she said eventually. He seemed to just now acknowledge that James was very near them, and his face showed that he did not like it. The two of them stared holes into each other for a second, and then Amos walked away, with one last sweet smile at Lily. After he was out of ear shot, Lily turned back to James and tried to talk to him, but he wasn't hearing anything.

"I'm so stupid," he said more angry than sad.

"No, James, listen to me. Just before you and the boys came up to the table Amos—"

"NO! I don't want to hear about precious Amos, perfect Amos. Stupid Hufflepuff, what are they good for anyway!" He was speaking without thinking and it hurt Lily quite a lot, but she tried to keep herself from showing it.

"James, he asked me to Hogsmeade—"

"Well, obviously."

"I didn't know you were going to ask me, usually you do it every two seconds. Imagine my surprise when you hadn't asked once all day."

James didn't cut her off this time but he did wave his hand as if to say "that's enough," long before she stopped talking.

"Don't worry, you don't have to try and make me feel better. You wanted him, that's fine." Then without any other word, James stormed down the corridor, turning down another at the nearest escape.

…

"It wasn't the happiest moment of my life," Lily said as she looked at her son's accusing face. "In fact, it was a very sad moment. I have always loved your Dad, even then, though I would never admit it. His words had burned a whole in my soul, but as I'm sure you can guess…" she waited for him to give some idea of understanding. Instead he wiggled his feet and chewed on his hands. She decided that must be some kind of answer, and continued. "I'm sure you can guess that that didn't sway my actions. I went with Amos anyway."

And the shadow literally sighed.

A/N: Okay, finally! This was a long time for you all to wait for an update on one of my stories! I submit pretty quickly when I have so many responses. Which, I have to say, YOU GUYS AND GIRLS ROCK...AGAIN! I know I'm not done yet, but I really have to say some things to my faithful reviewers! You all make me feel so squishy inside, especially when I'm having a bad day. I'd like to say thanks to Radical-rebel, A Vermilion Memory, Flutterby Princess, ReadingRobyn(who this update is for), grannyHPfan, tangrine, ballerinadoll9, angels.on.strike, messyblackhair66, Lady of the Rogue, Seldom Darlin, Cassara of Avka, banana-hater, Prince Jonathan's Lover and everyone else! A very special thanks to the ones who have stuck with it from the beginning, and those who have read many of my other stories! I really appreciate it!

The next chapter will be up as soon as I can offer it to you. It will be Hogsmeade, hopefully. I know what I want to write, I just have to figure out how to get it all together in the way I want. Anyway, thanks everyone...and...how...about...REVIEWS? I love you all. Thanks!


	12. Sad Eyes and Red Roses

Chapter 12: Sad Eyes and Red Roses

"Before I knew it, the buzz changed from who was going with whom to who was going to wear what. That's right, Harry. It was time for Hogsmeade." Lily smiled at her son, and began to speak again, as her son flailed his arms about in anticipation.

…

There she was, standing in front of a mirror with five other girls crowded all around her. "Please don't do this to me," she was saying as they giggled and fussed over her.

"Oh, no you don't!" Marlene said as she grabbed Lily's arms and steadied her. "You are going out with the stud of Hogwarts! You can't wear…that," Marlene literally had to force the words out as if they disgusted her.

She really didn't understand what the problem was. She couldn't over dress to Hogsmeade. Everyone wore jeans, trainers, and tee shirts. She already had one of her best shirts on. It was a light blue "boob shirt" as Emmeline called it. It wasn't anything fansy, but it looked good on her. But now Marlene was pulling out her stiletto dress shoes with open toes, and a pair of incredibly tight and form fitting jeans. As she looked them over, she couldn't help thinking, if the leg was any thinner she wouldn't be able to get out of them if she had got into them. But Marlene was smiling wide and encouraging her.

But before the mob got too violent, a knock interrupted everything. "Lily, you better come down here, right now!" The voice called before anyone actually opened the door. It sounded like one of the fourth year Gryffindor girls. Taking the opportunity to get away from giggling girls, she rushed out the door with little more than a "bye" to her roommates.

When she was outside, she found that it was indeed the young fourth year she had thought it was. Her name was Anna. She was smiling widely and giggling.

So much for leaving the giggling girls.

"Lily, guess what?"

She rolled her eyes. "I don't have time for guessing games, Hogsmeade is in a couple hours and I'm not ready yet."

Anna gave her once over and then looked back into her eyes. "You look like your pretty ready to me."

"Anna!" Lily said more sternly than aggressively, and Anna blushed a little at her delay of news.

"There is something for you downstairs in the common room."

Lily blushed feverishly, and then rushed past Anna without a second word. The whole common room had probably already seen whatever it was that was for her. She hoped it wasn't something from James. That would just start useless rumors.

Then again maybe getting something from him would be…

She threw away the thought as she rounded the corner and decended the last step into the common room. Ahead of her was a mob of people, mostly girls, and all seemed excited and giggling. They were crowded around something, but Lily couldn't get a good sight of it. She was arching her neck to try to see over the throng of people when someone turned around and noticed her.

"Lily!" the girl yelled out and everyone turned at the same time. Someone in the corner by the fire jumped out of there seat, and Lily couldn't help but look to see who it was. When she did, she felt regret immediately. She was met by sad hazel eyes that tried to hide their disappointment. Lily was too quick for feeble attempts, however, and she noticed the look in James Potter's glowing eyes.

She must have been distracted for quite a long time, because when she focused back on her surroundings there were tons of excited eyes staring holes into her. The whole room was looking at her, and aside from the boy in the corner, everyone was smiling at her. When she looked around the room and finally caught a glimpse of something, she realized why.

"Lily, they are for you!" said a seventh year girl with glasses. As she spoke she moved a little to reveal a golden vase and a dozen red roses. Lily blushed again.

She moved slowly toward the table with the flowers on it, but she couldn't help her eyes wondering to the corner. She still felt bad about what happened, and if these flowers weren't from him, as she was sure now that they weren't, then she would feel even worse. He hadn't deserved this, no matter how stupid he was sometimes.

When she was in front of the flowers she noticed a note within the blossoms. She could smell the roses, but they didn't really have any affect on her. She never really was a fan of roses, she preferred daisies. Roses seemed like such a distant flower, beauty unattainable, but daisies were friendly and fun.

The note, however, made up for the roses. She read it carefully, so no one else could see it.

_Lily,_

_I was thinking about you and I saw these. They reminded me of your beautiful hair. I couldn't resist._

_Amos_

The signature stung her for a second. It had been so sweet, and caring, but for the first time, she realized she had gotten everything any girl could want, and she didn't. She sighed and then remembered the other girls standing around. They were squealing and asking her who they were from. She told them and they squealed so loud the upstairs dormitory door flew open.

"What is all the ruckus down here?" came the voice of Marlene. No explanation was needed, however, once she saw the table and the flowers. She squealed just as the other girls had and then the whole sixth year girl's dorm emptied into the small corridor that led to the common room. Before long they were all crowded around Lily questioning her. She resigned to giving them the letter and instead looked for the hazel eyes she was almost afraid to see into. Once she found the subject, she realized the eyes weren't looking her way any more. She was kind of glad, but then he disappeared out the portrait hole. Once again Lily was left with giggling girls.

…

After what seemed like hours of giggling, she finally headed out of the common room. Everyone had busied themselves about doing there makeup and freshening up, a few fights had broken out for the bathroom, but most of all, people were giddy. Lily had decided not to change, but she did pull her hair into a pretty French twist.

As she stood outside the portrait hole waiting for Amos to meet her, she couldn't help her mind realing. People were rushing out the portrait hole giving her encouraging smiles, but she just stood there brooding over certain situations. It had been so long since she had talked to James, and she felt really badly about what had happened. She felt cruel and mean, beyond measure. He had finally been sincere for once in his life and she had shot him down. Not that she would have said yes, if she hadn't been going with Amos, but she could have at least kept from breaking his heart.

Was that what she had done? Did she break his heart?

She tried to stop thinking about it, but then an image of him leaving the portrait hole looking very upset came back to her. She hadn't seen him again that morning, not after he had left. She wondered where he had gone.

As if in answer a group of seventh year Ravenclaws walked by talking and Lily just caught enough to know that she was getting paid back.

"Did you hear? She's going with James Potter, that cute sixth year in Gryffindor. He always was the charmer."

"I heard he got down on him knees and sang to her."

"Oh, don't be silly, James wouldn't—"

But by then they were too far away to hear any more. She felt something in the pit of her stomach for one solitary minute. Jealousy. It wasn't that she wanted…

She couldn't even say it. It was just that she was so used to being his only focus. And hadn't he said that he would always be waiting for her? Didn't he say he would always be there for her?

She was half tempted to follow them and find out who this girl was, but then a hand reached out and touched her shoulder. She turned around and saw Amos Diggory smiling dazzlingly.

"Ready?" he asked, and she was. He took her hand and they headed in the same direction everyone else seemed to be going. She was trying to avoid his gaze, but she could feel his eyes on her. He kept glancing over as if waiting for her to say something, but she remained quiet.

Then, it was like something hit her over the head. She realized why he kept looking at her.

"Thank you for the flowers Amos. They were beautiful," she exclaimed, blushing slightly.

"Oh, it was no problem really," he said genuinely. "I just wanted to get you something to tell you how special you are."

She almost lost her legs. She must have appeared shocked as well, because Amos smiled shyly at her.

"I have to admit, I…" he laughed in that same shy way and looked to the floor, "I can't keep my eyes off of you. You look beautiful, Lily."

She smiled proud of herself, and pleased that someone recognized her own sense of style as pretty. She decided to keep a note in her mind to tell Marlene next time she saw her. When she came back to her senses she caught him glancing down at her collarbone where the skin was showing due to her low cut shirt. She blushed, and when he saw that she was looking at him he blushed even brighter.

"I have to tell you that I didn't think you'd come with me," Amos said as he looked back at the path in front of him.

She scrunched her eyebrows at him. "Why not?"

He looked even more shy in that moment. He looked to the ground and bit the side of his lip. "Oh, no reason."

She smiled at him, but decided to press him anyway. "No, really. Amos, you are the best looking guy in school, why would you think any girl would say no to you?"

He looked up at her with the happiest look she had ever seen on his face. He seemed to be very pleased that she thought so. With her confession he seemed to gain more confidence and looked her directly in the eyes. "Well, you know, because of the whole James Potter thing."

Her smile fell. Only minutes before the thought of him had brought her happiness. But now his name annoyed her greatly. She was tired of people thinking they were together; she was tired of boys avoiding her because they thought she was his property or something. She was tired of the whole thing, especially her own part in it.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, knowing full well what he meant.

"You two just always seemed to be…for each other, you know?"

"No, I don't," she said more rudely than she had meant to, "Merlin, why does everyone have to say that?"

"Well, believe me, Lily," Amos said, trying to retain sanity while she seemed to be loosing it, "I'm glad the two of you aren't. Whenever he said you were his girlfriend, I almost passed out. And then the other day, when I saw the two of you together…"

"Amos," she said trying to think of words that would confirm for him that nothing was going on. Oddly enough, though, she couldn't think of any.

He just put up his hand and kept talking. "It's okay, Lily, you don't need to explain. But, when I saw you together, I thought maybe you had changed your mind. I can't believe you didn't at some point."

She looked at this gorgeous guy who seemed so shy. How could that be possible? "Amos, I would never do that. This is the most wonderful moment I've had in so long, I can't even remember the last time I felt so special."

"Good," he said with a smile, as the shyness ebbed away a little. "You should know how perfect you are."

…

Harry started crying…loudly. Lily could not figure out what was wrong. "You were okay just a second ago, darling, what is the matter?" He just took in a deep breath and let out another scream.

"Don't you want me to continue the story? Won't that make you feel better?" Harry wasn't letting up. She thought maybe if she just tried to get back into the story it would be okay, so she tried. "Well, like I was saying, Amos said—" but before she got any further Harry let out a very loud scream again.

She paused. She had a bit of a hunch, but she needed it confirmed. "Amos," she said, and again Harry burst out.

"Oh, my dear boy," she said as she began laughing, "is that why you are crying? Don't like me talking about any boys besides your Daddy? Well, isn't that sweet. Well, if you insist, I'll skip ahead. I can't delete him from the story, but I'll stop talking about mushy stuff. Will that satisfy you?"

Harry giggled.

"Fine."

…

Hogsmeade was full as usual on the weekends when Hogwarts unloaded the kids for a fun day. The streets were lined with young people. Sometimes it was almost comical to think of how annoying it must be for the residents of Hogsmeade to have to deal with children running crazy in there town all the time. The business side, however, could benefit from nothing greater. Zonko's was the biggest money maker on Hogsmeade weekends, but the Three Broomsticks was a very close second. For Lily Evans and her friends, it was the best place to catch up. Every year they would go to Hogsmeade with their dates, and then at 3 o'clock they would meet at the Three Broomsticks to gossip and tell stories. It was tradition.

"Lily!" someone said from a table in the center of the shop. It was about time for her Hogsmeade 'catch up' right now. The voice belonged to none other than Emmeline Vance. She was practically jumping out of her seat to catch Lily's attention. When Marlene, who was sitting beside her, caught sight of it she practically yanked the girl back down. "Oy!" she yelled, and Lily rolled her eyes.

Marlene was sitting with her feet up in the seat, looking comfortable with her butterbeer in hand. Beside her sat Emmeline, and across from her sat Alice with a book open.

"So?" asked Marlene, catching Lily's attention again.

"So, what?"

"What happened?" she asked enthusiastically and somewhat impatient.

"I could ask you the same question." Lily looked at her mischievously noticing the somewhat unkempt appearance of her pigtails.

Marlene seemed to notice her scrutiny, and just threw her hands in the air. "So I got a little snogging in before I met up with the girls, big deal," she smiled widely, obviously proud of herself. Meanwhile, Alice's face finally appeared from above her book with shock evident all over her rosy cheeks.

"No talks about snogging, Marlene, you are going to make me hurl," Emmeline said from beside her. Marlene just laughed in knowing.

Lily seemed confused and decided to inquire, but Emmeline just crossed her arms and said, "I don't want to talk about it." It was apparent by Marlene's face, however, that Emmeline's date had gotten a little more scandalous that she would have liked.

"How about you, Lily? Any exciting snogs with a perfect Hufflepuff boy?"

Lily just smiled and grabbed Marlene's butterbeer, which she took down in one swig. The other girls began to giggle, except for Alice who seemed to get very serious.

"Girls, now that Lily is here we have to have that one discussion."

"What discussion?" Lily asked as she looked around the table. Alice was looking at Marlene to give her the answers, but Marlene was just fiddling with her empty mug, while Emmeline looked anywhere but between the other three girls. "What discussion?" Lily asked again.

Marlene scoffed, shrugged and rolled her eyes all at the same time. "It's just Potter is all."

Alice interrupted with more emphasis. "Lily, what happened? I thought you two were on good terms?"

"What are you talking about, Alice?"

Marlene looked straight at her this time and answered the question for Alice, "he went with that stupid Ravenclaw girl you hate so much."

Lily stopped as if dead. She couldn't even feel her heart beating. "Indigo Puce?"

The three girls exchanged looks and then nodded together.

Lily's face went red. If one person could almost always ruin her day it was Indigo Puce. She was a Ravenclaw prefect, pureblood, and know it all. She was, as other people had told her, her only competition for Head Girl next year. She hated her. Not only was she pretty, she smiled too much, laughed too much, and didn't have a clue about the things that really mattered. She had practically invited herself into Slug Club. And, what was worse, she was very pretty.

"Excuse me?" Lily asked trying to control her emotions.

"See, that is what I mean," Alice said forcefully, until Lily glared at her. She continued, but softer than before, "the two of you seem to have had a falling out."

Lily wasn't listening anymore, though. She got up out of her seat, and without saying goodbye walked toward the door, whispering, "I don't know what he is playing at."

…

"Then I was out of there in a burst of flames. My face was about as red as my hair at that moment, and it wouldn't die down after that. Now, all I had to do was see if it was true."

Harry giggled, the shadow, however, didn't move an inch.

A/N: This chapter is kind of weird, in the way I wrote it. I can't seem to get out of it either, because I started to work on the next chapter and it seems weird too. But anyway, I wanted to say some things about this chapter before I get the question. For one, I kind of made the girls the counterparts of the Marauders. If you look at their characteristics you will see the similarities. Marlene is to Sirius, Emmeline is to Peter, Alice is to Remus, and Lily, of course, is to James. And the only other thing I wanted to mention was the character Indigo Puce is a little joke of mine about Lavender Brown. Her name is kind of the same thing, and her character is going to be similar. I love making similarities between the MWPP era and the Golden Trio era. It's just fun. lol. Hope you like it!


	13. That Word We Know So Well

Chapter 13: That Word We Know So Well

Disclaimer: The Wizarding World isnt all fluff. They have their prejudices as well. All the messages, the lessons (however unobtrusive), and especially "that word we know so well" are all hers. And I love her even more for it.

Lily coughed loudly. The room was getting colder as the night wore on farther. She looked down at her son and thought it best to cover him in his Merlin blanket. Afterward she looked around for something to cover herself in. There was bound to be a blanket somewhere in the room. She turned to look around, but saw only a jacket that belonged to her husband. She smiled and gratefully wrapped it around her shivering body.

It used to be one of his favorites when they were kids, but now he only wore it around the house. This jacket always reminded her of that year. The year they both changed for the better. And his jacket…it smelled like that year too. It smelled like James Potter, cocky, arrogant, and her subject of weakness.

As if in response to her thoughts her son cried and took away her attention. She looked up and realized that she had somehow ended up sitting down in the rocking chair. She wondered how long she had been silent, just sitting there. But she had no time to think about it because now she had a crying baby to deal with…again.

She got up and crossed to the little boy. He was smiling and looking just like his daddy. She almost dreaded telling this next part of the story. Someone this young didn't need to hear these things, but she had to. It was always best to put everything on the table. Besides he was too young to realize what it all meant anyway.

It was the word that scared her the most. How could she say that word?

"Okay, Harry, prepare yourself…" then under her breath she said, "or maybe I should prepare myself."

…

Lily found herself on a run. She didn't know what was happening or how she had gotten here, but little was considered as one foot fell after another. She was thinking of one thing, and one thing only.

James Potter and that ninny, Indigo Puce, walking hand in hand.

She could just see her now, caressing his bicep and cooing in his ear. The thought made her sick. She couldn't believe this was happening. What happened to the sweet boy who said "I'll be there for you" and "I've changed." This seemed like classic James Potter to her.

She continued straight right past Honeydukes and Zonkos. If she knew James he was somewhere "oo"ing and "ah"ing at some new broomstick, and if she knew Indigo, she was somewhere staring at herself in a mirror.

She didn't know where the two could be combined so she decided just to keep going straight. When she reached a turn in the road, however, she noticed the Hog's Head and thought she'd take a look in there. It wasn't the ideal places to go, but it would give the boy's privacy if they were trying to get away from there dates.

Sometimes it spooked her how well she could map out the Marauders.

Then, something happened. Just as she was about to turn down the road, she noticed something up ahead. There was Sirius Black spinning around in a beautiful smooth Sirius way, but something was wrong. It seemed that he was having malfunctions with his clothing. Sure enough, he was fiddling with a jacket that wouldn't go on right, just outside of Dervish and Banges. And, not surprisingly, James Potter was right behind him with his wand raised jinxing the coat so it wouldn't go about his shoulders correctly.

There he was—jinxing his own best friend, and laughing about it. The thought repulsed her. It repulsed her enough that she marched right toward him, with no regard for who saw, even if it was Indigo Puce.

She was a couple strides away when something strange happened. All of a sudden, Lily wasn't moving anywhere. Actually, she wasn't moving at all. Someone seemed to have frozen her. In the commotion of the busy streets, no one seemed to have noticed, even though Lily was crying out in her mind for someone to see.

Unfortunately for Lily, someone did see, but not the someone she hoped. She was pushed away more to a corner at this point, but because she couldn't move her own body, she had no idea how she had gotten there. Before she had time to establish where she was, the ground collided with her face and suddenly she could move again. She shook her head, trying to free herself from the cloudy vision she had sustained. Then she turned herself, noticing on the way that she was not in a safe place any more. Her body tightened up as she saw that the ground was not fresh dirt and golden walk ways, nor was it marble or wooden floors. What she was looking at was mud, and the place she was looking at was dark.

The whole place was dark. She looked up, finally, as she gained her balance, and noticed she was in some sort of hidden alleyway. She hadn't even noticed it herself as she had walked by. She wondered if anyone knew she was here. Then, she realized, in one flash of a grin, that someone did know she was here. But it wasn't a comfort now.

"Lily Evans, proud Gryffindor! I wonder if he would be equally as proud to see a mudblood in his house today!" the voice, and grin, belonged to a Slytherin boy who teased her frequently. His name was of little consequence, but Lily could never forget those eyes.

Then, she noticed, as her eyes began to focus, that he wasn't alone. Out of the shadows walked three other Slytherin boys, one of which she knew very well.

_"LEAVE HIM ALONE!"_

_"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"_

She remembered it well. Just a year ago, it had happened, and now here was Severus Snape smiling maliciously as if he owned the world.

"You know," said the first Slytherin as if on cue, when the other boys walked up beside him, "I don't think little mudblood girl knows what is best for her."

Indeed, she didn't. Here she was standing tall and proud, and there they were—four boys who despised her simply for being born. Perhaps she was stepping on toes looking as angry as she did.

"Maybe we ought to teach her boys," he said as he pulled out his wand and flicked it in warning.

Severus came forward first and put his wand to her neck. He began to whisper to her, so the other boys could only faintly hear him, but the words pained Lily, mostly because of how much hate filled them. "When you leave here, he will come for you first, Mudblood. And then you will be sorry!" He almost spat on her face, but she didn't flinch. She just stood there, a lordly lioness being cornered by malicious snakes.

Then, without warning one of the wands alit with fire and before Lily could prepare herself, the light hit her square in the chest. The pain was inevitable, but the degree was beyond Lily's comprehension. She shrunk with quaking silence, because the pain was so great, she could not speak. She tried to look down at her body to see if it was still intact but it hurt to try. The only glimpse she got was her legs wiggling uncontrollably.

All four boys laughed in unison as her body finally relaxed from the pain. She tried to breathe normally, but she couldn't. The pain was still coursing through her blood stream.

In another moment, Lily was in pain again and again and again.

Now she was crying out, almost in challenge to the roars of laughter around her. She was crying for her limbs and the pain, but most of all for that word. That word that burned in her soul, made her feel filthy and disgusting. That word that said she was nothing—it never went away. That word lurked no matter where she went, and now her bones would remember it as well.

She was preparing to cry out again when the laughter died down, and the pain decreased. She tried to stay attentive, and figure out what was going on, but she couldn't. Soon she was fading away into darkness, but before she left the waking world, a voice called out to her.

"Lily, everything is going to be okay."

The voice was peace, the voice was cleansing…

The voice cured the pain.

…

Harry's eyes were still wide open, but he kicked very minimally and he wouldn't dare cry.

The shadow stood up, and began pacing, and Lily followed suit.

Lily was crying now as she thought about her past. All the stupid things kids did, and all the stupid choices they make. But most of all, Lily was thinking about all the stupid mistakes she made, because kids will be dumb, but only if you let them. She thought about it. Had she been too easy on them? Had she given in, and let them do this? Then she remembered his words…

_"This is not your fault."_

…and Lily figured she should continue the story.

A/n: Okay, I did it. It was hard, and weird, but I did it. My writing is very grammatically incorrect, well it is as correct as I could figure out. Sometimes I write that, "flowy off the brain" stuff and its hard to edit and fix. If you see any big mistakes, I apologize in advance. I hope this makes you all happy. I really liked the last reviews! I've started working on the next chapter too, but its so silly and angsty. I hadnt intinded for my story to go that direction, but I suppose all humor must end in tears sometime. It will get funny again, I promise, and romance will be in the next few chapters (I know how much you galls love that stuff). But I have the end in sight now, so within the next 4-5 chapters I think I will have an end. Don't cry, I'll make it worth the wait...I hope. lol. Well, you know what to do...


	14. I Don't Need You to Rescue Me

Chapter 14: I Don't Need You to Rescue Me

Disclaimer: The creator of Quidditch, the Ministry of Magic, the Patronus Charm, and Ron Weasley...hehe...is not typing this right now. She is off somewhere writing the final book of the greatest series ever. If you would like an appointment, I can't help you.

Lily was rubbing the blanket where her arms were hidden. She was thinking about her words, and how she had tried to hide the pain from her son. It was the right thing to do, but it kept so much of it bottled up.

And then she thought of him. James Potter, the love of her life. A smile spread across her face, and she couldn't help it. It wasn't the sad smile that mixed with the tears when you were denying your own pain. It was a genuine, happy smile. He always did that to her.

"Well, enough of that, Harry. The next part is happy. I promise you that." And then she continued her story, starting from the first moment she woke up…she remembered everything, including the smell…

…

It was peppermint at first, and then a little butterbeer. The air, that is.

It was like a medley of sweet aromas, and all were so familiar. It was just on the tip of her tongue. Where did she smell all these things? They didn't match.

The peppermint, the butterbeer, the sweets and candies, and then there was the smell of parchment and ink, and something akin to a potion she had made in her fifth year. It was so familiar and yet so far away.

Then, it all came together.

"Lily? Are you awake?" It was the voice again. Now she remembered everything. She opened her eyes, though it hurt, and her sight fell upon a very happy and yet worried face. He lurked only inches from her face, as if her sight had gone, but his eyes and hair and glasses were undeniable.

"Potter, get away from me before I get a restraining order," she said with great difficulty. He laughed, and then seemed to get very excited as he shouted down the hallway.

"Madam Pomfrey! Madam Pomfrey! She's awake!"

Then, Lily realized where she was. The infirmary of Hogwarts was a place she rarely visited. Few of her friends or herself ever sustained injuries bad enough to hospitalize them.

Before she could finish the thought, or question James further, a spunky middle aged woman came running from an adjoined office. She was huffing at his impatience, but when she saw Lily she jumped and started running.

"Good," she was saying. "Now we can start the real treatment. Excuse me, Mr. Potter. Oh darling, you scared us there for a while. We tried to heal all the wounds—"

"Wounds?" Lily interrupted as her face lurched with pain.

"—But that simply didn't work. 'We need the potion' Professor Dumbledore said, and so here you go. It was brewed this morning by Professor Slughorn, it should go down easy, but if not—" She continued to babble, but Lily wasn't listening. She was looking at Potter to try to gauge how bad the wounds were. If the look matched the pain, she must look like a train wreck. But Potter's eyes remained pinned on Madam Pomfrey and a smile was all that seemed to crease him face.

Drawing Lily's attention back to Madam Pomfrey took no real difficulty. All the old woman had to do was shove the potion in her face. "Drink," she said, but Lily would rather lick a toad, from the way this stuff smelled. Madam Pomfrey must have noticed her face because she responded almost immediately, "well it doesn't smell nice, but it doesn't taste that bad."

Lily looked at her once and then chugged the glass, trying to get it over with. What she was met with was rancid milk and dung beetles. At least that was what it tasted like. She struggled to speak, "I thought you said it didn't taste that bad." She gag reflex almost caused her to throw it up as she spoke, but Madam Pomfrey hit her hard on the back and it all went down.

"Only one more glass after lunch and you will start seeing results," she said with a smile on her face. Lily, on the other hand, was thinking only of how much she wanted to punch her in that cute little smile of hers. But before she got the chance, Madam Pomfrey was gone again saying as she went, "come back after lunch!"

Lily gave the door she vacated a dirty look, and Potter laughed. She had almost forgotten he was there, but sure enough…

He looked so happy in that moment, but she didn't understand why.

"What are you staring at?"

His smile suddenly fell, and he looked at the ground, "oh nothing," he said.

"I'm sorry, Potter, I didn't mean to sound so rude, I just wanted to know why you looked so happy."

He looked back up at her with another happy smile, and then he reached up as if he was going to touch her cheek, and then thought better of it. "You look a lot better than you did."

Lily looked at him with a confused expression. "What did they do to me?"

"It's called Sectumsempra. It's outlawed, now. Most had never heard of it before, but Dumbledore had, somehow. It cuts you, like a suword would," he said mispronouncing the word sword, which he was probably quoting from somewhere. "It creates deep gashes and makes you bleed…a lot."

She thought about his words and didn't doubt it. That pain had been so great, she almost couldn't cry. Then he continued speaking as if in a blur. "They said you were lucky I was there, or else you might have died." Lily looked up expecting to see an arrogant smile on James' face, but instead was met with modesty, or something akin to it. At that moment, Lily caught sight of something. It was Potter's hand. It was covered in bandages.

"What happened to your hand?"

He looked down and moved his hand out of sight quickly, "nothing," he said simply. They went silent for a while, as Lily tried to read something from his face.

As if a spark alit in her brain, a thought suddenly occurred to Lily. "What do I look like, Potter?" His eyes shot up. He searched her face and then looked over at the bedside table where a mirror lay. He picked it up and handed it to her.

She took a deep breath before she looked into it, but she almost dropped the mirror when she saw her face. From forehead to chin she was covered in gashes. Her lip was split in several places, and her left eyebrow was sliced through like paper. Her nose sustained minor cuts, and her chin was slashed a little bit. But then her cheek…her right cheek was slashed from her temple to the corner of her mouth. It looked awful.

She wondered how James could just sit there looking at her like nothing had happened to her. Once she was done looking, she laid the mirror down on her lap. James at once took it and put it back on the table, then he shot up as if he had just thought of something.

"Are you hungry?" She almost laughed at his question, but then realized that he was genuinely concerned.

"If you had just drank what I did, you wouldn't dare ask that question." He prepared to laugh and then Lily broke in with an unexpected question. "Why did you go to Hogsmeade with Indigo?"

James stopped laughing and looked at her for a long moment. "I didn't lie to you, you know," he said after a long moment.

"That wasn't what I asked." A silence fell as he tried to figure out what to say, but inside Lily's mind was whirling. Why had she just asked him that?

"She asked me."

"Ugh! How low are some girls!" she broke in with force, but by the end she was exhausted from the pain in her face.

When she looked back at James he seemed to be insulted. "Oh, girls who like me are low?"

"No, that's not what I meant…" she faded off, what had she meant? "It's just inappropriate for a girl to ask a guy." She hoped that was what she meant.

"Why?"

"It goes against laws of nature!"

"Just like a girl trying to take on four boys who are bigger and crueler than her!" he responded, and Lily could taste the punch immediately.

"I didn't do anything!" she said with great difficulty. The cut on her mouth made it hard to emphasis any of her words.

"You were in an alley!"

"They dragged me there. First, they froze me, then they dragged me there to…" she stopped from the pain, but continued as best she could, trying to control her temper. "I don't know why I'm explaining this to you. You purebloods will never understand. Potter, they hurt me just for being born! They cut me for being what I am, no other reason!"

His face went soft as hers went harder, and then he actually reached up and touched her face. The sensation was not welcoming; it made her wince in pain as the wounds stung. He pulled his hand away quickly. "I know, Lily. I know better than you think. I remember what you said to me, however long ago it was, about having to try harder just to be able to get by in our world—" he corrected himself, "in _your _world. I'm sorry, Evans, I just worry about you."

"Well, that's your first mistake," she said back with little emotion in her words, though her mind was spinning. He actually remembered that conversation? He looked up as if confused, and then to the door where Madam Pomfrey had left a few moments ago. "Potter," she said to get his attention again. He looked back and she spoke again. "Potter, I don't want you to worry about me. I don't even want you to rescue me."

"Then, tell me, Evans, what do I have to do?" he was alluding to more than just protecting her, and she could feel it in the sound of his voice and she could see it in his eyes.

"I don't want you to save me, Potter. I don't even want you to say sorry. Not any more," she said forgetting for a second that she had never talked to James about that day in first year. She had never even told him how much it hurt her. But most importantly, she had never told him what hurt the most. "I want you to save yourself, Potter. I want you to stand up for yourself and what you believe." He looked up at her for one long moment. The world was spinning, but strangely enough, nothing was going through Lily's mind. All she was thinking was concentrated on staying awake and staring him down. Defiance was always her weapon, in everything. She was determined, that was her strength. James knew it, and he could barely match that fire in her eyes with his own. Rarely did he ever get close.

After what seemed like hours of staring at each other, the door to the infirmary flew open and a gang of kids came rushing in. Some were crying, others were whopping and hollering. The first person she noticed was Remus Lupin. He was smiling and rushing over to her. But the first voice she heard was Marlene's.

"OY! You better yet, you lazy sod?"

Lily almost died of laughter. The pain that was coursing through her body at smiling made the expression almost literal.

…

"Well, what do you think, Harry?" Lily said as she looked down at her glowing son. "Could your daddy and I have messed things up with each other any worse?" Harry giggled, but it was short lived. The boy was getting tired, she could see it in his eyes. Lily reached down and grabbed the blanket for the hundredth time to try and cover him again, but he just kept kicking it off.

"You know, I never told anyone this, but I was actually sad once all the scars were gone. I had never really had a major injury, and I kind of wanted to flaunt my battle wounds. Silly, huh?"

Harry laughed hysterically, and the shadow threw its hand to its face, as silently as possible.

A/N: Okay, so I'm done with that chapter. I have to say sorry, though, to ReadinRobyn. I told her I would update once I got home, and then on my way back from school my boyfriend, James(isnt that just perfect?), decided we needed to go to Best Buy. I got the first season of Will and Grace, by the way, it was on sale. lol. And then when I finally got home I got incredibly distracted. So, sorry ReadinRobyn and anyone else who wanted that update really fast! lol. Hope you liked this one. I rewrote it about...4 times. So, hope it was worth it, hope I picked the right version, lol, and enjoy. Read and review, s'il vous plait (if I wrote that wrong, sorry, its been a while!)


	15. Great Now the Whole School Will Know

Chapter 15: Great. Now the Whole School Will Know

Disclaimer: JKR. Good? Good.

"The next couple days are a haze. What I can tell you is that I slept a lot."

Harry giggled at his mum's nonsense, and then rolled over to hear more. The shadow outside the door, that waited, oh, so patiently for whatever was to come next, lightly sat down on the ground again, and became enveloped in the story once again.

"Now," said Lily, "some time passed, maybe only a day, maybe a week, I don't really recall, but the next thing I remember is sitting down to breakfast with Remus…"

…

"Lily, are you gonna eat that?" Remus asked as he reached across the table and grabbed another roll off her plate.

"I guess not," she said as he pulled some other unknown substance from the table and firmly shoved it into his mouth.

Apparently he was hungry.

Lily must have been staring at him because at that moment he stopped moving, all except his hand with the roll in it—it just went slower.

"I'm hungry," he said as if the answer was sufficient.

She had almost forgotten that Remus got sick a lot, and after he would go on bed rest he would come back pale and drained. Apparently this time he hadn't eaten much either.

"Well, have at it, I'm not that hungry." Lily was about as pale as he was, but he scars were almost gone. The only one that stayed was the long gash on her arm. Somehow now she seemed to remember that it was the first one. It was the first pain she felt, she was sure of it. It had been so deeply filled with hate, that it wouldn't go away. She was just glad it wasn't on her face. She figured eventually it would be gone, but till then she would admire it, in some dark way.

"So what really happened, Lily?" Remus said as his hand continued to roam over her plate. She knew what he meant, but she was afraid to answer him.

"I don't know what you mean," she said to stall for time. She really didn't want to go into this, but when she saw him face she realized there was no getting out of this. "Didn't James tell you?"

He rolled his eyes. "He told me his side. But I want to know what happened before he rescued you."

"Before he rescued me?" she asked. She couldn't help but be a little put out at the comment. No one rescued Lily Evans without her consent!

"Yeah, he was the one who found you and took you to the castle, didn't you know?"

Didn't she know? Not that he had taken her back to the castle. Okay, she knew, but she didn't want to know.

Remus looked at her searchingly, but when she didn't answer he continued. "He saw you before it happened, he said you were marching up to him, or something, but then the next second he didn't see you at all. Then, he went to look for you, but he couldn't locate you. Then, he noticed the alley…"

Lily cringed, but Remus continued. "He found them…hovering over you…and he…"

"He jinxed them?"

Remus laughed, "No, he didn't even fiddle with the wand, he flung at them with his bare hands. Bloodied them up pretty good, too, from what I hear."

Lily thought back. That's why his hand was bandaged.

"After he settled with them," Remus continued, "he just swung you up in his arms and walked back to Hogwarts."

Lily's jaw dropped. "Walked?" James Potter walking seemed almost unfathomable. He either apparated, or flew everywhere. And walking from Hogsmeade would be a long walk for anyone, even herself.

"Well," Remus said as he looked down at the floor in a shy way, "he apparated to the gates of Hogwarts and then walked you in."

Lily was still impressed, though she made no indication that she was. Remus continued, "He marched right past the Professors, right past the students, all the way to the infirmary, and that was where he stayed till you woke up."

"He didn't leave?" Lily asked perplexedly.

"Not one moment…well…he left to go to the bathroom I'm sure, but every time we came to check up on you, he was still there."

"But what about classes?" Lily thought in horror. He gave up a whole day of classes to stare at an unconscious person?

"He skipped. Though, technically I guess you can't call it that, because all the teachers knew where he was. We were scared for you for a while there, thought you wouldn't wake up, so they allowed it."

Lily went red. They thought she wouldn't wake up? He was the only one who stayed with her all that time? He was there…he was there so she wouldn't have to be alone when she woke up. She felt it instinctively. That's why he did it. She knew it.

Lily must have gone a deeper shade of red, because Remus smirked at her from the side of his mouth. Lily noticed and immediately went back to normal. As if a light bulb went on in Remus' head he lunged forward to confirm it.

"You like him, don't you?"

Lily cringed and then shivered and then… "NO!" she said in denial mode. It didn't work. However much she was screaming it in her head, Remus didn't believe her.

"You do like him," he said with finality. She pouted and tried to pretend that it wasn't true, but somewhere in her, she was all a-twitter at the idea of his hand in hers.

Suddenly, Lily realized something. He had sat with her, and took care of her, and she had been nothing but cruel to him. She had challenged him above reason, she had pushed him farther than she would anyone else, and he was still there for her.

Lily jumped up from her seat with less than lady like grace. The bench loudly creaked and everyone turned to look at her, including Remus who had half a potato hanging out his mouth. The Great Hall was pretty empty this time of morning, but most people would have noticed all the eyes. Not Lily, though, she wasn't looking at anyone, or paying attention to anyone. The only thing on her mind was the words she said at that moment, almost a whisper, "I have to find him."

Then she rushed out of the Hall leaving a very bewildered Remus behind.

…

She hurried through the halls in pursuit of the Gryffindor dwelling place. She had gone this way so many times, she didn't even have to think about it. Down the corridor, past the many paintings, up the stairs, around the bend, and all the way to the Fat Lady.

The overweight rosy cheeked lady smiled and admitted her after she gave the password. Lily looked around, but didn't see James. Sirius, however, was sitting in the corner with his face mere inches away from Marlene's. When she came in, they both looked over at her. Without a word, they both pointed to the stairs that led to the dormitories. She smiled in thanks and ran up the stairs toward the boy's dormitory. She passed the first years, second years, third years, and almost got near the fourth year dormitories when someone plunged into her. She almost fell back but he grabbed her around the waist to steady her. He had black hair and hazel eyes.

"Potter!" she shouted as she jumped away from him. "What are you doing here?"

She mentally slapped herself, but he just smiled. "Going to the common room to get Sirius and go to breakfast, you?" He rubbed his eyes as if he had just woken up, but his smile was dazzling as usual.

"Oh!" she said as she realized she hadn't answered him yet, "I was just…you know…doing stuff," she said lamely.

"In the boy's dormitory corridor?"

She huffed, "okay I was looking for you." He raised an eyebrow and yawned. She breathed out and tried to relax, but his face was so unknowing that she almost fainted.

Then, she looked down at his clothing, and saw that his shirt wasn't tucked in and his tie was loose. He looked like a model, especially when she looked at his tussled hair. Now, she really couldn't breath.

"Did you have some reason to go looking for me, Evans, other than to have a staring contest with my tie?" he asked, and she jumped away instantly.

"Oh, no," she said looking incredibly embarrassed, "I mean yes…wait, what?" James laughed at her and took her hand. He led her to where the corridor ended near the eldest boy's dormitories and sat down on the window ledge.

"What's the matter, Evans?"

She blushed and tried to lose eye contact. "I just wanted to…I wanted to say thank you…and…I'm sorry."

He smiled. She blushed even more.

After she didn't continue, James took her hand to get her attention, "that's a good start, Evans. Was there more?" She laughed hysterically, though she didn't know why. He smiled at her encouragement.

"Well, really, I…I didn't know that you walked me all the way to the castle, and I found it kind of—" Lily was still talking, but James was no longer listening, he seemed to have remembered something. He tightened his grip on her hand and then drug her into his dormitory. Lily was blushing furiously. "Potter, what do you think you are doing?"

"I have a present for you," he said simply.

"Not another present, Potter, I feel so stupid already." She rubbed her temple and felt the faint scar. It was almost gone, she thought to herself.

James was fumbling through his trunk, and about the time that she was thinking about her scar he pulled out a package. It was coin sized and trinket worthy. "I shrunk it," he said simply. She wondered what for.

Then, he pulled out his wand and muttered a spell that enlarged the package to the size of a small broomstick. Now, she could clearly see that it was a box. It was long and rectangular and thin around the sides. He was smiling very widely as he took the top off the box.

Inside laid a dozen beautiful daisies. Her favorite flower. She almost died right there.

He was talking now, as he removed the flowers from the box. "I was going to give these to you when you were let out of the infirmary, but I haven't seen you in a while, so I just kept them till my next opportunity." He handed them to her, and she smiled with a slight blush on her cheeks. He smiled as well, and then stepped back to give her distance. That was something she always appreciated about Potter, he always gave her her distance.

Suddenly something must have occurred to James because his voice broke through the silence again, at first harshly, but then very sweetly. "I know they aren't roses, but I always thought daisies were happier flowers."

She smiled widely and felt mushy inside. They stared at each other for a second and then James rushed to the door to open it for her. She took the offer and went to the door. She was half way through when she turned back.

It was a mistake.

He was mere inches from her face. She could see the flecks of gold in his eyes, and the light flush in his cheeks. And she was sure he could count her freckles if he wanted, or stare at the remaining scars that could only be seen up close. She felt herself crossing the invisible line between them. She could feel the forces pulling them together. She dreaded this, and yearned for it at the same time. She was almost touching him, she knew because she could feel his breath on her skin. It tickled and excited her. Her heart was pounding as the seconds went slower and slower and then…

"No, I will not go out with you!" a voice down the corridor shouted. They jumped away from each other and looked down to see Alice being trailed by a very moody Frank Longbottom. "I told you, I'm not going to your room, I'm just looking for—" It was at that moment that Alice and Frank noticed the other two. Alice went red, and Frank smiled goofily. "Lily," she finished.

Neither James or Lily spoke, but Alice seemed to suddenly have the urge to explain herself, because she continued speaking, very loudly in fact. "I was just looking for you, Lily, the others said you went up here for some reason. Now, I see that we are intruding—"

Before she could finish the thought Lily broke in, "what did you need, Alice?"

Sometimes she wondered how she did that. She was so good at changing the subject in awkward times. It always took just that one person to pretend like nothing happened for the rest of the world to follow. She always seemed to be that person.

Alice rolled her eyes and walked up to Lily. When she got there she smiled widely at James, who was blushing furiously, and then grabbed Lily's arm and drug her off. When the girls passed Frank they saw that he was looking at James with praise. When Alice wasn't looking Frank gave James the thumbs up. Alice may have missed it, but Lily didn't.

Oh great, she thought, now the whole school will know.

…

Harry was giggling happily and sucking on his toes like he always did. He seemed to have broken out of whatever plagued him before. Meanwhile, Lily was laughing hysterically and trying to keep her blanket from falling off her shoulders.

The shadow got up, and almost walked in the door at that moment, but then Lily continued talking. "Oh, but there was so much more, Harry. So much more!"

Then the shadow sat back down and smiled beneath its heavy hood.

A/N: Okay, just a little bit more. I really liked writing this chapter, but it was hard. It probably doesnt flow very well, but I tried at least. It's funny to look back at the way this story started and how it has progressed. Surprisingly, though, I'm still following the same line of thinking, though. But I have a surprise ending that will probably make all of you angry with me, but I can't help myself. It will make me laugh, at least. Don't worry, I'm not gonna break them up or anything. The boy will still get the girl, but there will be a twist in story line. And for those who havent figured out who the shadow is yet, maybe it will be a bit of a shock to you as well, though probably not. Thanks everyone, hope you like this one. Please R&R.


	16. Howl to the Falling Action

Chapter 16: Howl to the Falling Action

Disclaimer: I, Kira, do hereby disclaim Harry Potter, in accordance with JK Rowling and the other writers on this site who would kill me if I didn't. Thank you and have a great day.

Lily stopped completely after she told her boy that there was more. She suddenly realized that what was "more" was not all sunshine and daisies, and it wasn't completely avoidable, either. Even if she could come up with some great remake, she wouldn't be able to fill in this blank. This blank that tied everything together.

"So much more," she said quietly again. She looked down at her anxious son, and continued, "And what was to come next was the topper."

…

Lily woke up to giggling girls. They hadn't stopped giggling since they had heard about her date with Amos, and then her "encounter" with James Potter. Encounter was the brilliant word Lily came up with to avoid talking about it. One night it severely angered Marlene into saying, "he sounds like an extra-terrestrial!"

But, you know… sometimes she wondered. Sometimes she wondered whether this creature, this James Potter, was real or not. One moment he was silly and stupid, and the next he was charming and sweet. She didn't know what to think, and the confusion bugged the hell out of her. She tried her best to avoid the subject at all costs, but some days it was harder than others…

Like days when the girls decided to gang up on her in her sleep and wait an inch away from her face until she woke up so they could play truth or dare and find out if Lily actually did kiss James like everyone was saying she did.

Nothing too specific, of course.

And it was this day in particular, because it was a Saturday and no one had classes, that they grabbed there pillows and plopped onto her bed.

"So…are you ready to talk about it yet?" Emmeline asked. She had been asking her that same question ever since the incident, and ever since the incident Lily had been saying "no comment." Today was no different. She gave Emmeline a dirty look and rolled over in bed so her face was buried in her pillow.

"Come on, Lily, it's just us," Marlene said. She was currently sitting on Lily's feet, but she didn't care, and she was too tired to yank her feet out from under the crazed Marlene.

"Lily, just tell us the truth," this time it was Alice. "And if you don't tell them at least tell me, I think I actually deserve an explanation."

Lily rolled back over and sat up in bed. There would be no sleeping-in on this Saturday.

"Don't you girls ever get tired of asking?" she inquired.

They all looked at each other, then turned back to Lily and said, "NO!"

"And we won't until you tell us the truth!" Emmeline whined.

"Or at least if he was any good," Marlene said with a flip of her hair.

"It's okay, we'll understand anything you want to tell us," Alice interjected with an encouraging hand on her hand.

Lily stopped, stunned. This was just too much for her. Then, faster than you can say "Potter has rock hard abs," she was out of the door and down the corridor.

She was going to go to breakfast and vent a little to the easiest person to complain to: Remus.

But there was a problem this morning. When she went to sit at her usual place at the table in the Great Hall she found that Remus wasn't there. She tried looking around to see if he had been misplaced, but sure enough, he was no where to be found. Things like this only happened when Remus got sick. She was worried, but she knew that Remus was used to it by now, so she decided to skip breakfast. She hadn't been hungry anyway, she just wanted to talk to her best friend.

She was about an inch from stepping over the threshold between the Great Hall and the world beyond when she heard a couple of voices she recognized just on the other side of the door.

"I don't see what the big deal is," one of the voices was saying. She was certain that the voice belonged to Peter Pettigrew. Lily wrinkled her eyebrows at what she heard. And she had to admit, she was curious.

She stopped to listen just as the second voice began, "yeah, I know, and now we have to pay for it! And here I thought James was my friend!" The voice was undeniably Sirius Black, but Lily wasn't thinking about his voice, she was thinking about his words. What had James done? James never did anything to Sirius. They were best friends and practically worshiped each other. But Sirius was still huffing when she came out of her thoughts.

"Yeah," Peter said weakly.

"It's just Snivellus, like anyone cares about him." Severus? What happened to him?

"Yeah," Peter said again, but a silence followed. She was about to give up on finding any information, but then Sirius broke the silence.

"Well, after breakfast we'll go visit Remus. Hopefully, he isn't too mad." And then more forcefully he added, "I mean, honestly, it's just another day in a hospital bed for him, he's used to it."

Lily's ears reddened. He was sick again. But this time he was in the hospital wing? She had never heard of him being in the hospital wing before for his illnesses. He would just sit in bed for a couple days.

Or did he?

Maybe this was some kind of conspiracy. Maybe Remus kept it a secret so she wouldn't worry. But why did the "crap for brains" twins get to know and she didn't?

Then, just like that, she was angry at Remus Lupin. And without even a thought about being caught listening in on other people's conversations she stormed out of the Great Hall passing Sirius and Peter on her way.

"Oh, hi Lily!" Peter said enthusiastically as she passed, but at the look on her face he suddenly changed his focus.

She marched, literally marched, all the way to the hospital wing. She was not going to let him get away with this. She was his friend too, and, by her opinion, a better one than the Marauder Mess-ups. She rolled her eyes heavily and continued to march all the way to the door. She found herself at the door to the infirmary, but without even a glance to see that no one was coming, she flung the doors open and stormed in.

Only one bed was occupied in the whole room, and it was at the far corner of the infirmary. There lay a boy with white linens pilled to his chin. When she entered, he drew them even closer.

"No one is supposed to be in here right now!" he said in a raspy voice, but it was still obviously Remus.

Lily, still in a rage, stormed up to him without heeding his words, but as she got closer her pace slowed.

As she got closer she saw clearly what had happened. Remus wasn't "sick to the stomach, puke a lot" sick or "green from a potion gone wrong" sick, or even "I didn't do my homework so I'm pretending to be sick" kind of sick. Remus was very very sick.

"What happened to you?" she asked as she drew closer and saw that what used to be Remus' face was ripped to shreds and his usually pale complexion was even more so. He was covered in a light sweat, as well, and his eyes that always seemed cheery were sad and tired, like a lost child, and yet something in his face terrified her.

"Lily?" he asked from within the blankets. He tried to cover his face, but Lily had already seen the damage.

"Remus, what happened to you?" she asked again with slight tears in her eyes.

"Now, Lily you were not supposed to see this," he offered in a nervous tone.

"Well, I have!" she yelled, despite the quiet of the room. "Now, tell me, what happened to you?"

Remus just looked at her for a few moments. Then, he let out a large puff of air, and looked to the ground. "Lily, haven't you ever wondered why I miss so many lessons?"

Lily looked at him questioningly. What did he mean? "Well, you are sick a lot," she said in a naive voice.

"Yes, Lily, but do you know why? Haven't you ever noticed a pattern?"

Lily paused for a moment, and then out of the blue broke into tears. "Please don't tell me it's sectumsempra! I couldn't stand to know they did this to you all the time, Remus!"

He looked at her questioningly and incredibly shocked. "Huh?" he said simply. When she didn't calm down he put out his hand, that was also covered in scratches, and placed it on hers. "Lily, think about the pattern."

She looked up at him perplexedly. What pattern? He just got sick. Now, it was very frequent. Maybe that was what he meant. "Well, it does happen a lot. But I don't remember it ever being like this," she said as she reached out to touch his face, but he drew away.

"Well, how could you know, Lily? Have you ever see me when I'm sick?" His face was calm, but impatient. But he was right; he would be gone for a couple days and Lily wouldn't see him until he was better again.

Remus must have seen her mind reeling, because he clenched onto her arm tighter and made her look at him. "Lily, you said it happens a lot."

"Yeah, very often, sometimes I worry about you, but Potter just says you are okay and that you are used to it." She sounded like a little baby, she knew this, but she couldn't change it when he was so dominating and impatient like this.

"About how often?" he asked.

"I don't know," she said, "maybe once every 5 weeks."

"Maybe every month?"

"Well, yeah, probably so…" Lily began, but in the middle of her response she finally understood. She took one moment to let it all sink in, but then the tears poured out of her like water from a faucet. She couldn't stop, even though she really wanted to, because Remus' face was so sad in that moment.

He was staring at the ground, waiting for her to finish crying, but there seemed to be no end in sight.

Eventually, she calmed down a little and Remus looked her in the eyes, "you don't hate me, do you?"

She stopped crying that instant, and looked at him significantly for a long time. "I could never hate you, Remus." She grabbed hold of his arm as she spoke, as well as control of her emotions. "You are my best friend, and nothing will ever change that."

And for the first time since she had arrived, Remus smiled.

…

"And that is how I found out that my best friend was a werewolf," Lily said as she leaned her head onto her hand that gracefully lounged on the crib bars. "Now, it seems like it is something that I've always known. Maybe I always did and just didnt want to admit it. Who knows? But one thing is for sure: it changed my life. Sometimes I feel better for it, but usually I just feel worse." Lily smiled weakly at her son, but his eyes were drifting. His legs weren't kicking as much, but his voice was still full of giggles.

The shadow, however, was incredibly...attentive.

A/N: Okay, so that is the next chapter. Sorry it took me so long to write. I could not figure out what I wanted to do with the story next. But I figure after this chapter you can at least hypothesize about where I'm going with it. If you don't know, don't worry, you will in the next chapter. It's going to be a long one, I've already started it and will probably have it done very soon. Hopefully, but I do have a lot of homework. lol. I won't tease you too much though. It will come soon. I'm thinking two or three more chapters. The last one will mostly be in the present, but I'm not sure how much yet, so I don't know how many chapters are left. Thanks everyone, again. You guys and galls are wonderful! Thanks so much and enjoy!


	17. She Was a Goner

Chapter 17: She Was a Goner

Disclaimer: This disclaimer is very important, because I steal a great deal of plot in this chapter. I stole from JKR. She is a genius, and honestly, just plain better than me. So I disclaim. Enjoy.

WARNING: PLOT TWIST AHEAD! Just wait for it ;)

"Now that the secret was out, I visited Remus every time he got sick. That particular time, however, I visited him all through out the day. It was a good thing to take my mind off events. But eventually they all came tumbling back." Lily said to her half asleep little boy. It seemed that the story was actually working now. But, whether Lily knew it herself or not, she didn't care about putting the boy to sleep now. Now she was just reliving the good times.

As if it could read her mind, the shadow smiled.

…

Lily was whistling a lovely tune and spinning her wand between her fingers as she walked to another visit with Remus. She couldn't help it, she was actually glad. She always felt like there was some kind of barrier between Remus and her. She hated to admit it, because the demolishing of the barrier meant he was a werewolf, but she was actually glad that she knew it now. She felt light and at ease. She felt guilty, of course, because she knew that it was painful for him, and here she was smiling. But something in the situation made her feel comfortable. Now the dark closet monster was revealed to be a smelly sock, and they could all move on. She shrugged, okay, werewolf is a little worse than smelly sock, but they could get through it together.

And now she was strolling to the hospital wing, whistling and smiling. She had decided to take the rest of her lunch time to spend with Remus, so he could have company. She was just at the door, when she remembered that maybe she should have brought Remus a snack. She reached out for the door, anyway, and just hoped Remus would forgive her.

She was cut short on her thoughts, and her hand was still mid air, when the door flung open from the inside and Lily was suddenly faced with her own worse enemy, the torture of womanhood, the terror of night dreams, the plague within herself: desire.

There stood, about half a foot taller than her, the perfect, gorgeous boy of her dreams, and she hated herself for thinking so.

"Potter," she said flustered.

"Evans," he said as he ran his hand through his hair. They hadn't spoken since the incident in the boy's dormitory corridor, and barely even saw each other since then. It was, needless to say, awkward.

Lily was surprised to see him, obviously, but Potter's face seemed even more shocked.

"What are you doing here?" he asked as he tried to close the door to the hospital wing.

She, of course, grabbed hold of it and gave him a reassuring look. "It's okay, Potter, I already know about Remus." He gave her a look that seemed curious, so she said further, "I know about his condition, Potter."

He breathed a sigh of relief but then bent in closer to Lily to whisper. "Listen Lily, he has a hard time with this, so if you don't want to be his friend anymore at least promise to keep his secret." He was only inches from her face, but she shook her head anyway.

"He's my best friend. I would never do anything to hurt him."

James seemed to look at her very strongly in that moment, she wasn't sure if it was a searching look or just respect that shined in his eyes. They sat there for a moment just staring at each other, but then Lily remembered why she was here. She was coming to see Remus, not chat with Potter. Those kinds of things could be potentially dangerous. She knew from experience. As she snapped out of it, she realized the dangerousness of the situation. Here she was, staring at him only inches from him face, AGAIN. If someone saw them…

_Oh, what the hell_, she thought. But just as she was beginning to enjoy his close scrutiny and the look of his lips so close to hers, the door opened again. There stood Sirius and Peter. Lily and James jumped away from each other again, but to little avail. The boys saw, just like Frank and Alice had. Sirius didn't look twice, but Peter never stopped looking to start with.

"The two of you really need to find a better place to snog," Sirius said as he passed them. Peter followed with a huge grin on his face.

Once they were gone, Lily and James turned back to each other. Once again it was awkward, like conversations between the two never were. They stared for a while, and then looked around, then back at each other, all in sync. When they noticed there choreography they both burst into laughs. It always seemed that when things got awkward the only thing to do was laugh, so they felt at home once again.

"I'll see you later," Lily said, still laughing.

"Yeah," James returned with a laugh. Then, they separated and went there separate ways.

Without even gaining composure, Lily pushed open the door and strutted in.

At the sound of her laugh, Remus shot up. What she saw were fresh tears on his cheeks.

"What's the matter, Remus?" she asked, concerned.

"How much time you have?" he asked with a quivering lip.

Lily smiled. He could have a sense of humor even when he was upset about something.

But it was a sad smile.

"What's up?" she asked as she took a seat on the bed beside him.

"Well…" he started, but stopped as he rubbed the tears from his cheeks.

Lily didn't understand what would make him cry, so she tried to smooth it over as best she could. "You know, when they did sectumsempra on me I couldn't stop crying, while I sat in here. I thought my face and body would look like that forever—" She was unable to finish, however, because Remus threw his hand up to shush her.

"It's not that, Lily."

"Then, what is it?" she asked as her hand found his. His face answered nothing. "You can tell me anything, you know that right?"

He looked at her sarcastically, "Do you think I would have told you my secret otherwise?"

She laughed. Oh, yeah.

"It's about the boys," Remus said. "How is Severus?" He asked quickly as if something had dawned on him. "Is he back from St. Mungos, yet?"

"Severus? St. Mungos? What does any of that have to do with the boys?"

"Everything, Lily. Everything."

…

"Then, Remus proceeded to tell me all the gory details about the Shrieking Shack, and how Sirius had told Severus about it. The hardest part to hear was how ashamed Remus was of his friend. He was so angry with Sirius, mostly because he thought Sirius understood what it was like for him. If he had killed someone, it would be Remus' fault, even if Sirius had put him in harms way. Remus would be the killer."

Baby Harry cocked his head to the side, as if confused. Lily saw it, but knew she wouldn't tell him anything farther than that. Those details would remain for when he was older.

"Well, anyway, then Remus told me something I never expected to hear. Something that changed everything forever."

…

Remus was still talking about the incident, but Lily only listened half way. She was crying silent tears inside as she tried to stay attentive. She didn't know what was going on. All she did was cry nowadays! But just as she thought she might zone out, Remus said, "Good thing James was there."

Lily snapped up. "What about James?"

Remus looked up as if to say, "you didn't know?" but instead said, "he was the one who stopped it all. He stopped Severus before he got there, and he was the one who told Dumbledore."

Lily's jaw dropped. He had…what? Lily's mind was whirling so fast. "But they were all friendly just now."

"Yeah, they made up after they had a talk with Dumbledore. I don't know what he said, but it's all been resolved. James may have saved Severus' life, and mine."

Lily gulped down her heart beat. It was racing so hard.

_I don't want you to save me, I want you to save yourself._

She blinked, and it was gone. The dreams, the wishes, the hatred, the pain—all of it was gone. James was… _James_ was…

She couldn't even get to what he was, she was caught on that name, that face, that heart, that beautiful person who wanted nothing more than to be good to her and sweet and kind and perfect. He wanted everything she was, and she wanted everything he was.

Lily was sure.

She was a goner…

…

"The end," Lily said as she stood up and started marching toward the door, but then Harry's arms burst from under the covers in a wild frenzied mess. And he began crying. Oh, Merlin, how he cried!

"Alright alright!" Lily shouted over him, and he shushed immediately. "Obviously you are slicker than I thought. You are a clever one," she said as she sulked back to her seat, tired as ever.

The shadow stood up at that moment, prepared for whatever came next.

A/N: Sorry it took so long. I didn't know where I wanted to stop. But because I ended it here, the next chapter will be up by tomorrow. I'm very almost done. And I have to say I'm so happy that the feelings are finally out in the open. Lily finally understands. Yay! Hope you liked it! Guess what? Just two more chapters I think! Yay again! Yay, not because it is over, but because then all the secrets will be revealed. I can't wait for you guys to get to the twist. I'm afraid it might be easy to miss, so I'm probably gonna rewrite it a hundred times. I want you guys to understand it or it just won't be as thrilling for me. And the way it is playing in my head right now just doesnt seem obvious enough.

Oh and I wanted to apologize for not replying to everyone's reviews. I'm just so exhausted and really need rest. Yesterday, I went to school had to scale all the steps, then I left immediately and went to take my drivers test (I know an 18 year old should have a drivers license by now!) and I failed, boo, and then I had to try to get my homework done, then I had to go to work until 10, then I had to come home and finish my homework. I didnt sleep very well, either. Then I went to school again this morning. This has been my first free time to type, so hope you guys love me for it! Thanks again! Hope you likes!


	18. The Chase

Chapter 18: The Chase

Disclaimer: Almost done, but I still don't own Harry Potter.

"Now, what comes next is obvious, Harry, but since you are so keen on finding out what that is, I will tell you. I almost immediately reacted after the realization. The blood rushed to my head and my heart was telling my feet to pick up and go get him. There was, however, a bit of a delay."

…

"Lily? Are you alright?" Remus said. Lily had forgotten he was there. She had been so enveloped in her thoughts she forgot where she was, as well.

"Remus," she began but something caught in her throat.

"Lily?"

"I have to go," she said simply, and in that moment left her best friend. She flew out of the hospital wing and all the way out of the castle. If she knew James Potter at all, and she was sure she did, then he would be somewhere outside teasing some first year like usual. She looked down at her watch. Yep, it was about time for his daily jinxes.

She kept running until her feet met grass, and she had finally reached the courtyard. She searched frantically around, but didn't see him anywhere. She noticed a fellow sixth year Gryffindor boy across the way, and thought maybe he would have seen him.

"Dillan?"

The boy turned around and raised an eyebrow in question.

"Have you see, Jam-Potter?" she corrected herself.

The boy looked her up and down, she must have been a bad state, and then said, "last time I saw him he was in the Great Hall."

Lily started to walk away but spoke as she did so, "how long ago?"

"Maybe half an hour," he said in a flustered tone at her anxiety. She frowned at his answer, but decided to try it anyway.

She ran as fast as she could to the Great Hall, but when she got there she saw no sign of James. But she ran up to the table anyway, and located Alice.

"Where is he?" she asked without specifying who "he" was.

"Remus? I don't know—"

"No!" Lily almost yelled, cutting her off. "Potter."

Alice's eyes widened. "I don't know. He left about twenty minutes ago. Maybe you should check the Common Room."

Lily was running away again before Alice finished. She was starting to get tired, but she had to find him. Her feet eventually took her to the Gryffindor portrait hole where the Fat Lady grimaced at her appearance.

"My dear, what happened to you?" she asked as if trying to make conversation, but Lily wouldn't hear it.

"Hippogriff," she said impatiently, and the Fat Lady scoffed.

"Alright, alright!" she said and swung open.

The brightness of the morning sun coming through the window was the first thing that caught Lily's eyes. It almost blinded her as she moved into the room trying to blink it away. Once the portrait hole fell closed and her eyes adjusted she looked around the room and found that they were all staring right back at her.

"Lily, are you okay?" Sirius Black said as he came forward. Marlene was right behind him, and Peter scurried up to meet them, but she didn't see Potter anywhere.

"Where is Potter?" she asked and everyone seemed shocked.

"Why?" Sirius said with a knowing smirk on his face.

"I need to speak with him," Lily said angrily. She didn't have time for this. When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you want the rest of your life to start right away.

"He's in Dumbledore's office," Peter shouted out.

Sirius turned on him, "I was trying to build suspense!"

"I couldn't help it, I got so excited," Peter said as his face went red.

When they turned back, Lily was at the portrait hole.

"Someone's getting shagged tonight!" Sirius shouted.

Lily, unfortunately, heard him. Like always, it made her blood boil. She couldn't stand Sirius thinking he knew everything about everything.

But as she ran, she really thought about his words, and completely fell apart in laughter. She was laughing so hard it reverberated off the walls as her hair flew in the breeze.

She was mere feet away from her destination when she abruptly halted and stopped laughing. There stood Potter at the bottom the spiral staircase to Dumbledore's office ruffling his hair in nervousness and shifting his feet. He looked so cute, she couldn't stand it. She practically flew at him, but just before she pummeled him, he noticed her and suddenly she couldn't move her feet.

She must have seemed very silly by this point. She was acting like a crazy person, but she had to add to it. She opened her mouth and began talking like a lovesick puppy, "Hi Jam-Potter! I was just looking for you!" She was also out of breath which didn't help the situation. She giggled a little, and then realized what she was doing. She very quickly turned to her normal self, controlled and uninterested. It was a difficult battle she fought inside herself. "Sirius said you were in Dumbledore's office." She was huffing between breaths, trying to sound as natural as she could, but James caught it.

"What? Were you running a marathon?" he asked without listening to her words at all.

She laughed and leaned into him. "No, I was on the chase."

"What chase?"

"The chase of you."

His eyes flicked with something that seemed like hope. Her smile widened.

"I heard what you did, Potter," she said as she took a step closer to him.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Don't play dumb," she said as she seductively looked at him at bit her lip. "You are far too smart for playing dumb."

"Funny I thought I was far too dumb to play smart," he said as he grew rosy from her close scrutiny. Obviously, he was trying to remain calm too, but they had gotten near to kissing twice now, and neither was becoming very patient.

"Sh," she said softly as she stepped even closer to him. "What you did…" she almost couldn't say it, but James brought his hand up to her cheek.

"Don't say anything, Lily," he said, ensuring she wouldn't have to retell the details. "You don't have to say anything, I didn't do this for you."

She smiled, despite what most people's reaction would be to his statement. "I know," she almost whispered. Then, she grabbed his arms and threw them around her hips as she took advantage of his beautiful lips.

Everything was right. Everything was perfect. Everything was James Potter and Lily Evans. It was perfection. So long they had both fought to be perfection by themselves, but in that moment they realized that perfection was the two of them together. Nothing had ever felt so good for either.

Lily's lips caressed James' and their arms were all over each other in blissful passion. If it were a movie, this would be the point when the camera would start circling them and the world would stop moving. What really happened was far better. James took her hands in his, and when they finally stopped snogging, he brought her hand to his lips. He stared at her for a moment, in utter awe.

Then, despite anyone's expectations, James threw his arms in the air and shouted "YEAH!"

Lily proceeded to giggle into the back of her hand. She suddenly realized what had happened. Then she sigh loudly and James began to laugh.

"That was…"

"Yeah," James finished for her.

Then, in one fluid movement and with complete collaboration between them, without having to say a word, James put his arm around her shoulders and they walked away toward the common room.

"What do you think Sirius will say?" James asked as he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

She looked up into his shining eyes and answered, "I told you so."

Then, they walked out into the light of the corridor giggling like school sweethearts do.

A/N: Sorry, I know I said 2-3, but I couldnt get my computer up and running. This was as soon as I could! Hope you all like it! I didnt end with Lily in the present because that will be reserved for the next chapter. Just wait for it!


	19. The End

Chapter 19: The End

Disclaimer: This is the end...sad...but I still can't claim to own the characters or the universe. I'm not about to open that can of worms!

"And that is how I fell in love with your daddy," Lily said as she kissed her little boys hand. He was blinking heavily and his breath was very steady. He was so near to sleep, she almost rejoiced. She felt as if she had been telling this story for weeks, it exhausted her even more than the lack of sleep.

"And the rest is—" she began in a whisper, but was cut off by another voice.

"History," sounded from the doorway.

At first Lily's heart began pounding because she was afraid, after all, someone had been in her house without her knowledge, and these were dark times, but then it changed. As the person in the shadows came _out_ of the shadows and headed toward her one step at a time, her heart beat, not because of fear, but because of the same reason it pounded every day of her life since that fateful day so many years ago, on one side of a platform.

Had she not recognized the voice, she may have spun around, wand raised, but she knew who it was, even with her back to him. He continued taking small, almost silent steps to where she stood. It felt like each step was a mile farther away than the last, as he slowly found his way to her. Her face was tingling, her arms lay limp about her side; she could almost feel his heart beat now.

"For those who don't know, Lily Evans thereafter married James Potter, just months after leaving Hogwarts their seventh year. She was doubly above his league, but she loved him, crazy as it was." Harry began giggling and wiggling frantically, but still tiredly, to the voice he knew quite well.

At that point Lily couldn't help herself anymore, she turned around slowly to see the smiling face of a messy haired, glasses wearing, hazel eyed, little boy. Only now, he wasn't just a little boy, he was a grown man, a man whom she loved with all her heart.

He looked at her longingly, like he did everyday of their lives. She looked back with equal longing, but her feet were rooted to the spot. James seemed to know that she couldn't move, because he began walking in tiptoes toward her. Each step brought him closer to her. When he finally reached her, everything sped up in one synchronized flash of time. Lily jumped into his arms with a huge smile on her face, and James caught her and spun her in circles in his arms. When he began slowing his spinning, they embraced.

"I missed you today," she said simply.

"I know," he replied. They didn't dare talk about what took him away. It was something they didn't have to vocalize, they both knew, and they both were obligated to it.

James put his wife down in that moment, and though their faces had been sad and forlorn a second ago, now that they looked in each other's eyes, they could do nothing but smile.

James' arms were still around her, and she noticed something pressing into her back. She turned to see what it was, but he caught on before she caught sight of it. He pulled it away from her back and caressed the beautiful pendant as he looked down at it.

"Remember when I gave you this?"

"How did you get that?" she asked him without answering.

He looked down shyly, "I took it. I thought it would bring me good luck." She looked back at him with glassy eyes, he smiled at her sadly.

They stayed there for a second, with tired sadness in every feature, and then they snapped out of it and began giggling. Whenever they got too sad, they always found solace in each other's laughter.

"By the way love, I loved your version of our story."

She smiled, "you don't think it was too dramatic?"

"No, it was just right. It's something Harry will never forget."

She smiled again, and grabbed his hand to place a kiss on it. Then, Lily remembered Harry. She turned to see her little boy, but she was met with a sleeping baby.

She laughed, "Well, it worked, anyway."

James took her hand. "Come on, love. Let's go to bed."

Lily looked at him mischievously, "Don't boss me around, Potter." She smiled very widely at her old nickname for him.

He smiled equally as mischievous. "Only if you say please, Mrs. Potter."

They both laughed as quietly as they could, due to the sleeping baby, and then Lily wrapped her arms around her husband's waist and trotted out of the room.

"By the way," James began, "it really was a Nimbus 1990."

"I know," Lily said with a light laugh.

…

"Where do you think we'll be in 10 years?" Lily asked James as they walked back to the common room.

"Somewhere together, that's all I care about," James replied.

A/N: Okay, that's the end. I'm really sad it is over, and hope you guys are too. I may have made it a little anticlimatic, but I think the line "I loved your VERSION" to be rather exciting. I expect a hundred questions, so don't be afraid to ask. I will say this, because I'm sure you are all thinking, or maybe I'm just a huge nerd, and I think you are thinking it, but the story was a VERSION as James said. Whether that means it is true or not. What I kind of did with most of this chapter was allude to fanfiction. Ten points to anyone who can find the association I'm talking about. But with the version thing, you have to know that at least some thing were real, because of the Nimbus thing. That's all I'm saying, but I'll be happy to answer questions more in depth than that. Once again I want to say thank you to EVERYONE who reviewed! I'm so glad you all were with me for this, I don't know if I would have finished it otherwise. Over 100 reviews! That is insane! I've never had that kind of following for one of my stories. Now, I'm sorry, I have to promote myself: if you all liked this story and haven't read When Pigs Fly, by me, you might want to check it out. It's older, but it is still an LJ fic, and one of my favorites that I've ever written. I, also, have a great deal of Marauder's stuff in one shots and what not. Click on my name up top, you may even find some other great fics to read on my favorites list. That's how I find great fanfiction: checking out people's favorites. Anyway, this is really long, so I'm just going to say, thank you! Hope you enjoyed the ride.


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